« Dear Andy | Main | The Peanut Turns Five! »

September 23, 2009


Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.


I love the pure honesty in this post, straight from the heart.


I continue to be blown away. Nobody writes about the material that you do, MD. It's amazing to read. Thank you for sharing. It's really incredible.

Nothing But Bonfires

Baked beans and CORN? I am compelled to make some sort of poop joke, but every single one I think of is a little too gross. So I won't.


I think you need to add one.

#11 - Visit Sarah in SoCal. Commence Sonic tater tot face-stuffing.


When I read your divorce posts, I can't help but wonder if Boss Lady is doing okay too.


Um, is it weird that we're ignoring the fact that MD is totally HOT?


Having gotten divorced less than a year ago, I wish I could say I was as prepared for the solitude and loneliness of it all as you were. My husband and I got married young so I've never really been alone my entire life. It's been hard.

I'm learning to be alone though. I find it's good for me. More than I ever could have known.

Thank you for writing this. It's really helped.


For me, one of the only good things about single parenting is that I do get a fair amount of time to myself. After years of having very little alone time, I find it comforting. At some point it will probably get lonely, but for now, the rest of my life is so busy that I don't quite know how I'd manage without my down time.

Sounds like you take good care of yourself. Well done, MD, well done.


Today is the day of the week when my kids are with their father and I still relish having that time to myself so that when they come back to me tomorrow and for the rest of the week I can relish being a mom to my children. It's a weird place to be, yet here we are.

Thinking good thoughts for you, MD, and your whole family. Really.


It's amazing to hear this from the dad's point of view. I can't even begin to process it now. It's all too raw.But thank you for sharing this with us, MD. I wish all of you only the best.


That dinner sounds almost as delicious as a can of creamed corn mixed with hot rice, drizzled with kimchi juice, and washed down with a Diet Dr. Pepper.

At least you're eating and it's football season.

My bro is going through a similar situation, but he's one step ahead of you. How I wish you lived in the same town because I know you'd get along like a house on fire. I wish he had the support system you have here, sometimes I worry about him being so alone.

Thanks for letting us know you're keepin' on. Love the pics. That's one beautiful girl you got there.

Captain Dumbass

I love my wife and kids, but I think I'd go off the deep end without the occasional alone time.


WTF is wrong with beans and corn? You say that like it's a bad thing. And what self respecting Korean man doesn't have canned corned beef hash with rice and ketchup to fall back on?


Look at you there. ON the sofa. Wearing a shirt. I bet you even had trousers on.

I'm glad of it.

Solitude is pathetically underrated.

ps. you are coming to visit us in Vancouver for the Olympics tho' right?


Glad you're hanging in there, MD.

always home and uncool

I'm glad your list didn't include watch the Mets play "baseball." Now that would have been depressing.

Hang tough, MD. You're welcome to a weekend getaway out here in Metro-North 'burbs if you need one.

Driver B

Fabulous photos!
I'm in a similar spot right now in terms of quiet time - loneliness vs aloneness for me - but mine is because I'm unemployed in a new city that I don't like while Mr B is trying to prove himself at a Very Cool company.
Hanging out in your underwear is all well and good, but I need Things To Do that involve getting dressed and out of the house, but not spending money. I think the Rilke will help. Thanks dude, for sharing.

Carolyn K

I thought I was the only one who highlighted the Scrabble dictionary!


Yay, I'm always so (selfishly) happy to see a post from you! :)

The beans & corn story isn't that shocking (for a bachelor) but then I remembered what gastronomical delight you take in food and I thought, oooohhh.

The peanut is as cute and adorable as always.

I love that you're all about some time alone. I agree with that sentiment. I know you have tons of friends that will allow you to be social when you want to be too. (right?)



I watched that PBS documentary yesterday too! Wasn't it great?


I have been a lurker for some time but I wanted to finally make a comment, I am glad to see you are doing good.

I have never experienced what the feeling is like to go through a divorce, let alone a marriage, so I can't even pretend to understand what it feels like. But this post about being alone kinda hit home for me.

Man I dread being alone. Its to the point that anxiety kicks in and I end up "sober dialing" every single one of my contacts in my phonebook. I guess it comes from years of being around family and room mates and growing accustom to someone always being around. Now, living in a new city, I am learning to utilize my time to myself, which some days being better than others.

Reading your post help me realize that I am not appreciative of my time to myself and have been dependent on the people around me to fill that void.

"If you don't know yourself, then you will always be lonely."

Thank you for that nugget of truth.


I eat weird crap like that all the time. It's not just a man thing. It's a resourceful thing. And yes, the poop/fart jokes are endless on that combo.

SciFi Dad

Interestingly, my theoretical divorced life (of which I get glimpses of every summer when my wife and kids spend a couple of weeks with my inlaws up north while I work) would be fairly similar to what you described, except I have never acquired a taste for over-the-sink food consumption.

My wife cannot comprehend that before I got married, some weekends would start after work on Friday, end before work on Monday, and in between I would have NO contact with another human, remaining in my apartment the whole time.


I'm not a dad and I'm not divorced, but I was kinda curious what life looked like for you too. I imagine it's different with a beautiful child in the mix [lucky you].

I like opening cans and seasoning the contents with hot sauce. Very cool.

You and your daughter look happy. I like it.


I find most people aren't comfortable enough with themselves to spend time alone. I don't get that. If I didn't have time to be by myself for stretches at a time, I think I'd go insane (if I'm not already there already.)


Love your honesty about your life these days. And the pics with the Peanut are adorable. Wishing you all the best.


MD. - how is bosslady doing??


Those photos are ADORABLE! The Peanut is so cute and it looks like you guys are having a blast together. Sounds like you're handling everything pretty well, MD.


There are so few men out there who write about any aspect of parenting or relationships. That's why it's always so interesting to come here and read your perspective on things. Your honesty, openness and great writing are always appreciated. My only complaint is that I wish you'd write MORE.


I wonder how I'll be like if I were to ever get divorced. My husband and I have been together for 10 years, married for 3.5, and I turned 24 not too long ago. Sometimes I wonder what single life would be like, not because I want to be single, but it's a curious thought.

I'm glad to see that you seem to be doing alright. My sister actually laughed at me when I looked at her in the eye one day, teary eyed, and said, "MetroDad and BossLady are getting a divorce." Her reaction was, "awwww.. wait, WHAT?? Who are they?"


Today is my 15yr wedding anniversary and sadly its closer than ever to being the last one. Good to see life on the other side is manageable...


I'm not alone but I feel alone all the time. It's hard, this life. There are so many times that I yearn for some solitude but I can't because I have responsibilities as a wife and a mother. While it's true that being with my husband and kids is great, many times it's just not enough.


Wow, with teeth that bright, you won't be single for long. 'Cause if there is one thing that TV has taught me, it's that women love a man with white teeth.

Brent G.

It's not all fancy NYC dinner parties, late nights at trendy lounges, and a steady rotation of leggy Swedish fashion models?

Guess I might as well stay married!


You? Reality TV? I feel like Luke felt when Darth told him it was too late, and Luke replied with a "Then my father truly is dead."

I think you're just being humble today. Maybe you just read some biography on someone who did something great--like Dan Quayle, perhaps--and you're feeling small by comparison.

We all know it's nothing but hookers and cocaine up there on the island. And you can't convince us otherwise.

Julie Kang

Hey MD, I'm just struck dumb by how much Peanut has grown! What a little lady! And I am actually quite envious of your list, believe it or not. It sounds awesome, except for the canned beans part. It would definitely be all take-out, all the time if I were in your shoes.

Amy Sue Nathan

The problem with enjoying your own company - and that of your kid or kids is that it's easy to get comfortable in the pattern of you or the two of you, where it's an effort to imagine someone in your space and suggesting what's for dinner or telling you to pick up the laundry. I'm just sayin...that I'd really like to meet someone fabulous, but the thought of someone chiming in on all things me is not appealing.

Maybe I just haven't met the right guy. Duh.

So my advice is, if you want to meet someone, don't get to cozy with alone.

Emily C.

You sound like you're in a good and healthy place right now. I'm happy for you. The Peanut is adorable. She's growing up fast!

Jae Young

Haha, cute pictures! I admit, I am always a sucker for cute pictures, it's how I organize my surfing on the web.

And yes, I have to admit, one of my fave at home dinners when I was little was corn, rice and kimchi.

No hating on the being alone! I love being alone, sometimes too much, so I totally empathize. (I feel like there should be bullet points in this comment, for some reason...)


Maybe they were not so "happily married". I think there are people who can not be alone. Everyone is different. I need solitude. Since my husband works from 6 p.m.-3 a.m., it works out good for me.

Paige Jennifer

I suppose the fact that I've never outgrown eating Spaghettio's right out of the can room-temp, means I'd excel at being divorced. Extra points for recently realizing said canned food pairs nicely with a variety of reds.

And dude, skip My Antonio and find old episodes of Rock of Love (or as my friend renamed it, Look What The Cat Dragged In). Art in motion.

Cynthia H

I'd give my left tit for some solitude these days. My kids and husband are driving me crazy!


You and your daughter are too CUTE.

Speaking of solitude, how's the tv show pilot coming along? Curious what the state of that is right now. You know we'd love to see MetroDad translated onto the small yet holy tv screen!


We should start a canned food recipe exchange. I like chilli beans, canned white corn and stewed tomatoes. Add some spice and chow, baby!


There's something about a dad and a daughter having fun together that gets me every time. I'm 28 years old and I don't think there's a single photo of me and my dad together having as much fun together as you and the Peanut are right here. You're lucky to have one another. I don't think there's anything healthier for a girl/woman than having a great relationship with her father. She'll thank you for it one day, MD.

JJ Daddy Baby Momma

Look at that big kindergarten girl! F&V want her to come for a sleepover....


Divorce sucks. I'm very sorry.

Naveen Bachwani

Ever since I discovered your blog, I have read every thing you've written on it. I was sad to read about your divorce, and even felt a bit let-down, if I may say so! But I'm glad to know that you're doing alright, and wish you many many years of happiness with your Peanut.

Thanks for continuing to share...

sweet fine day/Jenna

Metrodad, we're pulling for you. If I were single, I'd probably eat the same....or noodle soups all the time. I get the alone thing...

Keith Wilcox

I'll probably not be getting divorced anytime soon, but boy, some of those things sound pretty appealing. I too am very comfortable being alone. I love my wife and all, but It'd be great just to experience the single life again for a little while. Not sure I'd want to make it permanent though. Sorta sucks to not have that choice I suppose. Sounds like your doing pretty well though. Take care!

The comments to this entry are closed.

I also blog at...

Bookmark and Share

September 2017

Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
          1 2
3 4 5 6 7 8 9
10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23
24 25 26 27 28 29 30
Blog powered by Typepad