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February 27, 2009


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I'm with BossLady. I was SHOCKED to see the Queen Bee mentality emerge at such a young age. I first noticed it when my daughter was four also. The worst is when I see little girls being mean...and their parents are standing right there!

Never underestimate the power of nurture.

Srilatha Janakaraj

For Daddy T-Shirts:
"On Diaper Duty"


Glad your back.

My daughter ran into in kindergarten. Her friends didn't want to play with her other friend.

I used it as a teaching example, saying one day that girl will be you. Don't treat people like that. The next day she was that girl. From then on, if a group won't play with someone, she does.

I picked her up from after school care one day. She was playing with a girl I didn't know. I asked about her and she said, "not many kids play with her, so I play with her every once in awhile.

Not sure it's my parenting, but something is going right with my kid.


I wanna buy the “Men who change diapers change the world.” shirt. Now.


Ooo, I love Janelle's idea. Kudos on the great idea, I know lots of parents who would buy clothing with such a good heart behind it all!

Heather P.

Welcome back, MD. I've missed you!


Queen bees ugh! I have been lurking and reading your blog for over a year now and you always have good posts!

I have a three year old boy and the other weekend at the park in our neighborhood three little "queen bees" asked our son to get off the swing so the three of them could swing together. My husband was standing right there, and they were so rude to our little guy. They were probably 6 or 7. My husband said "no, he is swinging right now and just got on" the girls said "he's a baby, he can go on the baby swing" then our lil man spoke up and said "no! you can go on the baby swing!" Go little dude tell those little brats where it's at! We were proud.


Want a combo for the Jedi shirt for my daughter and Fatherhood's the new black for me. Thanks.. Great blog! I think I've never left a comment before, but it rocks! Thanks again!

Greetings from Mexico


kids can be cruel. stories like that always shock and astonish me. where does that kind of behavior come from? were these kids not taught well by their parents? is it too much tv? is it their diet? pfff.
i love your onesies idea.

Black Hockey Jesus

"I might be a Dad Blogger but I'd still kick your ass."

Srilatha Janakaraj

oooh, and for the onesies:

"I make the rules"

"I think I think.. who woulda thunk it?"

C'mon MD.. we need a contest for the best oneliners!

Captain Dumbass

I'll take one of each of those t-shirts. I'd love some onesies but that would involve getting the wife pregnant. Should probably talk to her about that first.



"Milk Feed Babies, Not Veal"
"Child Tax Credit: $1000"
"Salma Hayek is my Morton's" (too topical?)

Dad T's

"Fatherhood: The best thing to happen after a night of tequila shots"
"Dad: Nature's ATM"
"Part-time Surgeon (cutting the cord counts, right?)"

Leslie K

Did you and your friends have a great time in Alta? I grew up skiing there with my dad. It's my all-time favorite place and we still try to get there 1-2 times per year.


I already have the "nobody puts baby in the corner" onesie for our girl. I have a picture of her wearing it in a corner. I need to post that on my blog.

Re: the mean girls, I'd invite them over and then discreetly pour a bunch of water under one's chair. Then make a HUGE deal out of calling attention to the fact that she peed herself and belongs in diapers. Then, I'd spank her for messing up you floors. Publicly.


Holy Crap "Eat it or wear it" would SO fit my husband since we've watched so many episodes of that I'll never forget the jingle. Any time he'd wear it I'd have to chime in the "yeah yeah yeah! dun dun dun!"


Daddy T-Shits
"Chicks dig my daddy"


Jeez, our buddy ski trips just used to be up at Whiteface.

Skiing at Alta? Grr, must - resist - jealousy...


Here's one of my favorite sayings that would be perfect for a onesie.

"Tits are for kids."

Liz Schubert

Hey, I live in Sandy, at the bottom of Little Cottonwood Canyon and was skiing at Alta on Sunday. Who'da thunk you'd be there too. Hope Utah treated you well!


Oh, c'mon, I want a Mommy one! MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY T'S. Ahem, sorry. I just became that girl.

I HATE mean little girls and quite possibly, their parents more.


How about simply "METRODAD." White letters, black shirt.


I know my husband will buy every single one that you have listed. Tomorrow when we will meet with some friends we haven't seen in a long while, he plans to put a black onesie that says "I only cry when ugly people hold me" on our sweet 10-month-old baby girl. You have no idea how excited he'd be to hear this news. Sigh.


I hate mean little girls. I also hate mean tween girls and mean high school girls. It's unreal how cruel girls can be! I remember a girl inviting another girl to her house purposely to ostracize her. In junior high, a "friend" told me that she and our other "friend" no longer wanted to be friends with me...just because. To this day, I hold resentment against that bitch - then again, I'm significantly more successful. If anything, mean girls teach non-mean girls exactly how NOT TO BEHAVE. Go MetroDad!


For Daddy's
"This is a rental, my real kids in the shop."
I actually use this line when my 4 year old has a public meltdown.


" i childproofed my house but they keep getting in" -saw this on facebook and "blogging dads are HOT!"

Amy Nathan

I taught preschool and I can tell you the meanies come out really early, unfortunately. One thing parents forget is that kids this age are smart. Really smart. In my opinion the best way to beat the beast (figuratively) is to first, be honest with the offender. They know what they are doing but they do not realize the repercussions or implications. Meaning, when you sit down with a mean tot and look him or her in the eye and say "By leaving out Peanut you are making her sad. Do you want to make her sad?" Most kids do not realize the cause/effect thing. That simple exchange has (fortunately and unfortunately) brought little ones to tears. All they know is that they are having fun and even that they are being mean - but not that it's making someone sad - or maybe cry. It's also easy to ask, "How would you feel if you wanted to play with Peanut and she said no?" And after that, at age 3 or 4, you make them play together and you insist/require that they PLAY NICE. And they will, more often than not. In the preschool environment it was not tolerated and we had an "everyone can play" and "we're all friends here" philosophy.

What's this mother like, I wonder.

Sorry Peanut had to experience that, even if she had fun with the brother.


Laughing out loud at "What's the magic word?".

And the suggested "Dad: Nature's ATM" is a must for a T-shirt.

Gayle K.

How do little girls become such bitchy divas at such a young age?

"Nobody puts baby in a corner" is already a onesie (at least here in San Francisco). That aside, I would totally shop at your store.


I always forgot how much I miss your posts until I see them pop up in my bloglines. WRITE MORE PLEASE!


LMAO at the vision of you in the hot tub saying "what's the magic word?" Reminds me of the time I saw my husband animatedly speaking to a woman at a picnic about sleep training, potty training, and pre-school admissions. He was so wrapped up in all this parenting talk, he didn't even notice that the woman's breast had popped out of her top!

Mama J

Make sure the store is up by Father's Day, MD! They would make great presents for all the dads out there.


Hey! We were in Alta last weekend also. What a great time to be there, wasn't it? Fresh powder AND spring temperatures? Pure heaven!

Was the hot tub you were talking about the one at The Cliff? How gorgeous is the view from there?

By the way, if you ever go with the Peanut, Alta has great ski programs for kids.


As soon as that store goes up, I'm buying all of those onesies and t-shirts. You're a good man, MD.


In the bath today, I thought of another one for your onesie collection: No Bath Till Brooklyn

(Crappers Delight made me snort fizzy water out of my nose.)

Grace aka blackbelt

Means little girls: because their moms/dads LET them. I wouldn't care if it were her f'in coronation - if my child acted like that, I'd give her a choice: be nice to everyone or tell everyone to go home. Pretty simple when you're 4x their size - why do parents cower??

Grace aka blackbelt

"Mean," not Means. Aargh.


"because I said so."

My husband has a Neighborhoodie with DADDY in Red Biker letters across the front, that seems to stop traffic regularly.


So funny, MD. Your dialog with your mother sounds like EVERY conversation I have with my own. Soooooo annoying.


Unfortunately nobody puts baby in the corner has already been done. And yes, I give it to all my friends who have girls. It's pretty darn funny!


Is it so wrong that I now want to punch a roomful of 4 year-old girls?

And I'm glad to see that I've got a male partner to my female Etiquette Bitch

As for onesies, let's tawk. We get so many pitches for slogan onesies at Cool Mom Picks, I can tell you which of those hasn't been done yet...

Elaine at Lipstickdaily

We haven't come across too much of the mean girl thing yet, though Maggie did have the experience once of being left out at a 6 year old birthday party. The girl who invited her was a casual acquaintance and she didn't know the other kids - - Maggie is very outgoing but they did NOT include her. She took it all in stride. I liked the comment that kids this age probably don't know the consequences of their behavior - - I'll remember that one. I've never seen it in the boys yet - - what's with that?


I always love coming here and reading about parenting from the dad's perspective. Another great post, MD. Thanks!


I once saw this on a baby shirt
"He did it!!" Then there is a big arrow pointing to the father..


Sugar and spice? Sorry, little girls are MEAN! Not to mention moody and dramatic. My heart goes out to Peanut.


"Kids are like pancakes... you always f*ck up the first on"


Sorry, I mean - "Kids are like pancakes... you always f*ck up the first one"



- "Mostly Human".

- "Ask my uncle, he's single, but smart". (for when uncle takes baby for walks)

- "They think it's funny now, but wait till i'm 16"

- It's borrowed, but amusing "Batteries not included"

For dad:
+1 vote for 'metrodad'.


I think all the t-shirts should have your profile picture (you, Peanut & MetroDog) as a logo on the sleeve of the shirt. Wouldn't that be cool?


"Padawan" for the onesies.

And re. Mean Girls, I am so not looking forward to this. My girl just turned two and I am completely with you on the actions have consequences front. Make 'em pay, Metrodad! Just make sure you tell us all about it afterwards.

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