"You Know How I Know You're Gay?"

Aside from the fact that I like Coldplay, have an unnatural love for cheesy romantic comedies, and once made a spinach dip in a loaf of sour dough bread...

I went to see Justin Timberlake in concert last night at Madison Square Garden.

And I liked it. 

Seriously. 

He fucking rocked.

I know that somewhere up there in dead rock-star heaven, my homies Tupac, Biggie, Sid Vicious, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Keith Moon, and Joe Strummer are looking down at me and shaking their heads in disgust.  What can I say, fellas?  I'm sorry. My beautiful wife and The Doctor made me do it! 

Man, fatherhood really has made me soft.

Quick observations...

(1) By a healthy margin, we were the oldest people at the concert (not including those who came with their kids.) In fact, the crowd was made up almost entirely of teenage girls.  Have you ever heard 20,000 screaming teenage girls?  It's like the piercing cry of the Valkyries on their way to Valhalla.   

(2) I'm no prude so I refuse to excoriate young people for adhering to the "less is more" philosophy of fashion that seems to be in vogue today.  However, at the current rate, it seems like a pretty safe bet that in 20 years, women will be going to concerts wearing only eyeliner and some dental floss. 

(3) The face value of the tickets was $145.00.  What the fuck?  Now, I'm not going to invoke my father who can't even eat a cheeseburger without commenting on what it cost him to eat one back in 1952 but it doesn't seem like that long ago when I could buy Grateful Dead tickets for $10 and a dime bag of Humboldt County's finest.

(4) Every once in awhile, I'll go to Wolfgang's Vault and drool over some of their rock memorabilia (like this $2,000 Led Zeppelin jacket from 1977.) My favorite things to check out are all their old-school vintage concert t-shirts.  Like an idiot, I threw most of mine away years ago. But recently, BossLady and I have started  this new thing.  Whenever we go to concerts now, we get a t-shirt for the Peanut that we vacuum seal so that in 20 years, she'll be able to glam out with brand-new vintage concert shirts. Cool idea, no?   

Now, in 20 years, Justin Timberlake will either be a global megastar who has redefined modern pop. 

Or he'll be the next Corey Hart. 

Either way, I have this vision of an older Peanut looking at me with teenage contempt while saying, "You went to see Justin Timberlake in concert when you were 38 years old?  You are so gay!"

 

Comments

[R2Dad]

You are brave, but JT? Eclectic is one thing, the next coming of David Hasselhoff is another. Maybe you ARE French? Questionable musical tastes aside, you're getting out with the Bosslady--props to you two.

[daddy drivel]

I watched 3 seasons of The Gilmore Girls, what does that make me?

[Shawn]

Dude. Totally gay, and not in the good way. Of course, admitting to liking the droning, whiney Coldplay isn't much better. But still. Timberlake? What kind of role model are you going to be when Peanut's musical tastes need to be honed?

[L.A. Daddy]

You should hang your head in shame... but, life is short. If you want to see what most people would describe as a Broadway musical and not a concert, enjoy :)

(My Motto: If there is choreography, it ain't a concert.)

(My Other Motto: It's not a sport if you can't use your hands. Sorry, Soccer fans.)

[twizzle]

MD - Actually, your admission to liking Mr. Timberlake, as well as big Hollywood musicals and other faggoty activities, makes you seem decidedly un-gay. It's lovely that you feel comfortable embracing your feminine said and subjecting yourself to ridicule amongst your vast readership. It's the uber-masculine guys who claim to puke when they see a guy without his shirt on (or think about man boobs) that you've gotta wonder about. Homophobes are most likely closeted bum-fuckers.

[Richard]

I was going to give you a little heat for going to see JT in concert but then I realized that my wife and I haven't been to a concert since our first daughter was born...7 years ago!

Hard to believe. We used to go to see shows all the time before we had kids. Man, at this point, I think I'd go see The Wiggles in concert.

Glad you guys had a good time.

[croutonboy]

We're through, you and I.

[Brent]

That concert t-shirt idea for your daughter is fucking awesome. What a great idea. Thanks. I'm going to start doing it for my kids also.

[Glennia]

Funny, my mom loves that Jason Timberland, too.

[Jenn Benn]

Although you have great intentions, Peanut will never get to wear your prized concert tees. My mom saved a few from the 70s and we are only allowed to look at them in the cedar chest(I'm 32). I totally get it now--can you imagine a 16 year old wiping her ketchup stined hands on them? They're too precious. It's good to save them though--totally brings me back when mom shows off her Beatles sweatshirt that she bought with months of allowance.

[Christy]

Brilliant idea, wonder if my Buffett T-shirts are worth anything? You know, when I see "JT", I think James Taylor. That's it. I'm old.

[KG]

There are so many 30-something closet JT fans. I'm seeing this all over Blogville. Hmmm...interesting. It's like some sort of former-boy-band, inter-generational, pop-music mind-meld is sweeping the country. What's next? A 60-something run on Nick Lachey concerts? Just watch.

The vacuum-packed t-shirt idea is priceless. Our Pumpkin actually has his OWN concert t-shirt -- we went to see the Laurie Berkner Band "on tour" and we got him one. It has a dinosaur on it! He wears it very proudly.

[halfmama]

You know how I know you're gay? Half your blog fans like Justin Timberlake too (*ahem* ...myself included).

You know how I know you're gay? You VACUUM SEAL JT concert tees. You may as well bedazzle it while you're at it.

(Says I, sitting at my computer on a Friday night.)

[Mitch McDad]

I feel gay for reading this....not that there's anything wrong with that...no, of course not.

What you failed to mention, and perhaps the most critical detail that needed to be mentioned, is "WHY" did you go to the Justin concert?

Were you being held at gunpoint? Did you exhaust all your episodes of Golden Girls on your Tivo and figured you had nothing better to do? Did you remember that you left your Members Only jacket at the Garden during the Styx concert back in '81 and you rushed over to retrieve it from lost and found...only to happen upon the Timberlake show? Is Joey Fatone your next door neighbor and did he dropped in with a couple of extra duckets that you just had to accept so as not to be rude?

I suppose I can't give you too much shit since it's Friday night, I'm digesting some mediocre Chinese food, my wife's asleep and I've got nothing better to do than this.

[MikeyMike]

JT is THE MAN.

Why?

1. Britney in her prime. Before she got all fucked up and whacked out.

2. Cameron Diaz. And turned her into a head case.

3. J. Biel. Or Scarlett Johansssen. Not sure who was next. But made both of them AND Diaz fight over him.

4. Now with J. Biel.

There is nothing gay about respecting JT. The man is already a legend in Hollywood Ass-tappery.

Not since Scott Baio has someone made such a impressive foray through female celebrity before.

[The Parents Zone]

"You went to see Justin Timberlake in concert when you were 38 years old? You are so gay!" LOL :D ... I like your humor Metro Dad.

[Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah]

But really, you are kind of gay.

When we are all dead and in rock and roll heaven me and Layne Staley are going to kick your ass for this one.

[alexthegirl]

OMG (just imagine it in a 15-year-old's voice)! A friend introduced me to your blog and I haven't stopped laughing since. Unfortunately, I may have contributed to "the piercing cry of the Valkyries on their way to Valhalla" (JT was my favorite in N'sync) at one point or another...well maybe more like many points. But I say, more power to ya MetroDad.

[misfithausfrau]

I was blissfully unaware of JT and boy bands in general--that is until my husband and I saw a certain SNL skit in December, "Dick in a Box." JT was HILARIOUS! We constantly watch that stupid skit on YouTube and even looked for his live version of the song that he played earlier this year.

Did he play it at your show?

[Lucy Dee]

Aside from the fact that I like Coldplay, have an unnatural love for cheesy romantic comedies...

Check and double-check. Wait! I liked Coldplay for their 1st and 2nd album, and all their EPs before. But not post-Gwyneth. Nothing against her, it's just that she sort of Yoko Ono'ed the band. And granted Coldplay didn't break up, but the music started to suck and drop in meaning/value/integrity precipitously.

[galadriel]

Corey Haim and Corey Feldman maybe but not Corey Hart!

But it was definitely the spinach dip in the bread bowel that gave it away.

[Henri]

Damn your a mean guy. Making ridiculous stuff up just to sit back and laugh at readers agreeing with you is just plain mean. The saddest part is that some people REALLY do love JT. We shouldn't make fun of them.

[Henri]

Last! Booya

[Jonathon Morgan]

Oh, take THAT Henri. I'M LAST NOW. mwA HA HA!

I'll admit to enjoying the occasional romantic comedy, but JT? MD, I thought I knew you.

[Melanie]

I'm sure you guys were not only the oldest ones at the concert but the coolest ones too. Sounds like a fun night out!

[How About Two?]

Dude. Mentioning Stevie Ray Vaughn and he-with-less-than-no-talent in the same breath gets you a front row seat to rock 'n roll hell.

Captain & Tennille, Billy Ray Cyrus, and Vanilla Ice will be your concert for eternity.

[Henri]

Damn I didn't really think that "Last! Booya" thing through too well. Damn Jonathon...of all of my arch enemies why did it have to be you. I flail my arms in your general direction.

[Henri]

"I'm sure you guys were not only the oldest ones at the concert but the coolest ones too."

Wow this may be the absolute best unintentional backhanded smack slap I have read in the past hour.

[Queeny]

Frankly, my dear, I like him too.

[JustLinda]

Here's a hint...

Go to see Neil Diamond.

The ridicule is about the same PLUS you get to be amongst the YOUNGEST there instead of the oldest. LOL

(Long time, no comment. Did you miss me?? I was off in the corner wallowing in self-pity, but I'm back now...)

[emma]

I think Justin Timberlake rocks too..and I'm not just saying that because I'm a middle aged wench who wants to jump his bones!

[stella]

my husbands name is zack.

he secretly likes jt too.

when sexy back comes on.

he yells "im bringing sexy ZACK".

good times.

[David]

If he's good enough for Cameron Diaz, he's good enough for you.

[Ryan]

My wife LOVES Justin Timberlake so I'm surprising her with tickets to next week's concert in Vegas. Works out well for both of us. A little JT for her. A little blackjack for me.

[p-man]

I hear Annette Funicello is coming to town. Wanna go? Of course you do... anyone else?

[Mama's Moon]

Don't you know that 'gay' is today's 'cool' as applied to dads the world over? *wink, wink* I must say, though, you're one brave papa to tolerate a live concert with all those crazy teenagers! Hubz and I are waiting for the HBO special...hehehe.

[creative-type dad]

JT?? Say it isn't so...

I don't know what to think anymore.

Although, who am I to say anything? I went to a Lionel Richie concert a few months ago. And I've been to Debbie Gibson and Michael Bolton (with "special guest" Kenny G.

Oh Great- now you made me gay too!

[Cherlyn V]

Ah, Humboldt county. My childhood home rests within the "Emerald Triangle" - Humboldt, Mendocino, and Trinity Counties. Ah, the old days.

[Candy]

Damn. Long time reader but have not posted a comment until now. Tsk tsk tsk.

I cringe every time a promo for JT's HBO concert comes on. I cannot believe MetroDad went to his concert and also blogged about it. Sign of the apocalypse? Check!

The JT t-shirt? I think Peanut will probably use it for a spirit dress up day in high school. Kids are dressing up for 80s days now---Peanut will have the perfect gay double-0s outfit. Don't forget to vacuum seal some ass crack jeans!

[winterwheat]

LOL! Don't worry, I had the same reaction to Justin Timberlake when I saw him on SNL. I wanted to hate him, but his talent is undeniable. And like Ricky Martin, the guy LOVES to perform. It's hard not to get caught up in that.

But I'm way too cool to go to one of his concerts.

;-)

[honglien123]

Nah, it's not that gay. I'd like to think you're like those men who wear pink shirts; really comfortable with their masculinity...or something.

[Waya]

I'm holding my hand up and the other on my hip saying "oh no he didn't, somebody tell me he didn't go see JT!!"

Dude, I guess I'm the only one in this whole universe who thinks JT is not talented at all. I even posted about it before, "an open letter to JT".

But I guess, as Seinfeld said "not that it's anything wrong with it." as in the gay reference. Whatever floats your boat but I loved that Dennis Miller's quote btw. You are a walking quoting machine Pierre!!

[RookieMom Whitney]

I love the t-shirt idea. It will be posted on RookieMoms.com tomorrow with credit to you.

[woohag]

Just watched that JT concert on HBO the other night. I didn't love it like I thought I would, and found his thrice-mentioned commentary of "I love to drink" and "fuck you" irresponsible for all the teenagers that idolize him. And yes, I realize I sound like a grandmother.

[Joe]

Justin Timberlake...damn, you must not be gay to admit to seeing him in concert and paying a buck fifty to boot. Its cool if you like Justin, he sells records right, I still think the best thing he has done was the dick in a box. Peace.

[Iris]

Gear up for grub with a tripleheader of pigskin, including a meeting of brothers in Dallas. Everybody knows it's been a rough year for her, but find out who else had issues

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[Millicent]

Times are changing for the better if I can get this onnlie!

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