In their infinite wisdom, the good folks over at alt-parenting site Babble have decided to give me my own blog.
According to their press release, Babble is:
"a revolution in parenting magazines: a publication that talks to urban parents not just as caregivers, but as fun, smart, intellectually curious people. It will apply Nerve’s tradition of irreverent honesty to the experience of parenting without the infantilizing, hyper-judgmental tone or acquisitive baby-as-accessory bent of so much of today's parenting fare."
I don't know how much help I'll be in fomenting the revolution. Unless the uprising is waged with loofahs, bottles of scotch, and witty banter, I'm generally not much of a "revolutionary" kind of guy.
However, I am genuinely glad that Babble approached me with this opportunity. I subscribe to every parenting magazine available and I've yet to find one that really speaks to ME. Most of them seem to be written solely for women and tend to promote this weird cookie-cutter cult of stay-at-home domesticity. Others place far too much emphasis on shopping and product placement. And very few really ever touch on anything personal or substantive.
But their biggest crime? None of them are funny!
Forget all the crap regarding hipster parents, urban mamas, AlternaDads, or Grups. At the end of the day, Babble is just a smart, edgy parenting magazine with a wicked sense of humor about being a parent. Because as any caring parent who has been barfed on at 4:00 am knows, parenting is very often an existential exercise in hilarity.
Anyway, I'm both extremely honored and humbled to join their irreverent collection of great writers (which include everyone from A.M. Homes to Jennifer Baumgardner to Walter Kirn.) REAL writers whom I've had the pleasure of reading over the years.
Current blogs over at Babble presently include Steve Almond's "Baby Daddy," Barbara Rushkoff's "A Girl Grows in Brooklyn," and Rebecca Woolf's "Straight From the Bottle."
Me? I've got no title for my new blog. And I've got a terrible case of brain flatulence these days. I've been thinking of a title for weeks and absolutely NOTHING is coming to my mind. So that's where YOU guys come in.
Since most of you know me pretty well, I figured you could help me come up with a witty title for my new Babble blog. So I've decided to have a little contest. Help me come up with a name for my new blog: a name, label, or catchphrase that I'll take over with me to Babble.
To increase the incentive and get your creative juices flowing, I've got some great prizes! Here's what the grand-prize winner will get:
(1) The latest high-end Digital Photo Frame from Phillips. So new that it's not even available in stores yet. These things rock the house. Not only is the picture quality stunning, it's clear that a lot of thought went into the beautifully streamlined design. They're absolutely gorgeous and would look great anywhere.
.
.
(2) An advance DVD of "Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan," the brilliant film starring Sacha Baron Cohen. With classic lines such as "My moustache still tastes of your testes!" and "What's up with you, Vanilla Face?," this film has already achieved cult status.
.
(3) Your choice of one of my favorite NYC foods that I will personally vacuum-seal with love and send to you. Winner will select from one of the following: hot dogs from Gray's Papaya, bagels from H & H, pastrami from Katz's Deli, or bacon from Peter Luger's Steakhouse.
The contest will close on Friday, February 23 at midnight. Then, BossLady and I will decide which one we like best and we'll announce the winner.
Ready, set, go!
p.s. Special prize to the first person who correctly guesses the origin of this post's title. No googling!
sorry....no good blog titles come to mind, but isn't the title from a tribe called quest song?
Posted by: grant | February 16, 2007 at 12:31 PM
What is a poet? all balls no cock! ha....TCQ
still thinking about the title....
Posted by: Angela | February 16, 2007 at 12:31 PM
What to the what to the what to the WHAT, Q-tip!!!
Posted by: Charlie | February 16, 2007 at 12:36 PM
Hmm...pretty close. Grant did get the reference but Angela got the actual song. I'll call it a tie. E-mail me your addresses in private so I can send you your prizes. I'm impressed.
Posted by: MetroDad | February 16, 2007 at 12:36 PM
Ack! I'm too late with the TCQ answer! Now I will have to burn my brain for a fitting title.
Posted by: hello insomnia | February 16, 2007 at 12:45 PM
Aw, Angela beat me!
Posted by: Charlie | February 16, 2007 at 12:50 PM
I know the name of this post comes from A Tribe Called Quests song "What"
Give me more time for the title game thought
Posted by: Kemp | February 16, 2007 at 12:53 PM
Title ideas: "Big Pimping" or "Papa's Got a Brand New Bag!"
Posted by: Brian | February 16, 2007 at 12:55 PM
What's Alex Haley if it doesn't have roots?
What's a weekend if you ain't knockin boots? What's a black nation, without black unity? What is a child who doesn't know pubery?
I LOVE THAT SONG! Haven't heard it in ages. I'm going to have to buy it on itunes now. See you! Be back with title ideas later.
Posted by: leslie | February 16, 2007 at 12:57 PM
dammit, I want that photo frame!
sadly I, myself, am creatively challenged...
metroBabble???
Posted by: navi | February 16, 2007 at 01:02 PM
Down With The Bad Dad (or Baaaad Dad)
The Designated Daddy (The DD is okay - the DH not so much)
MetroParenting: A Daddy Guide (maybe you should use that for your book)
FatherCentric
Daddying in NYC
If I think of any others, I will let you know
Posted by: JGS | February 16, 2007 at 01:34 PM
Who's your Metrodaddy?
(i knew i could kiss the picture frame goodbye if i used ur instead of your)
Posted by: oncRN | February 16, 2007 at 01:39 PM
"Superman but without a telephone booth"
"Dad vs. Rest of the World"
"How things change when you become a dad"
"What my dad didn't tell me"
Altered from one of your own post titles:
"My theory of relativity: Einstein knew nothing"
I'll try to think of more... I have to win some authentic New York Vacuumed Sealed Hot dogs. I christened hot dogs as one of my own personal food groups, right after Cadbury mini-eggs and frozen burritos.
Posted by: planet3rry | February 16, 2007 at 01:44 PM
How about "Downtown Daddy"?
Posted by: leora | February 16, 2007 at 02:16 PM
Chaos Theory: Ramblings of (a) MetroDad
there's only one of you, so "a" doesn't really apply, but I like the way it sounds in my head. "The" sounded a little pretentious.
Congrats on your own blog at Babble. I love reading Metrodad and sing your praises to all my friends.
Posted by: MyKianaKeiki | February 16, 2007 at 02:27 PM
How about "From Here To Paternity?"
Posted by: Molly Chase | February 16, 2007 at 02:33 PM
I haven't any ideas for a title as I couldn't even come up with anything too original for my own. But I just wanted to say congrats. I'm looking forward to reading your new stuff!
Posted by: Kelly | February 16, 2007 at 02:53 PM
These are my submissions:
Wisdom of "Abojee"
Life, Love, and the Peanut Chronicles
Boss Lady, Peanut and me all make a great family.
Dads of the world Unite!
Being a Dad means living life to the fullest.
Father doesn't always know best, but damn he sure tries hard.
Metrodad says...
Posted by: Roger | February 16, 2007 at 03:04 PM
I was always more of a De La Soul man, myself.
Congrats on the new blog, MD!
How about riffing off the "MD" initials and do something like, "MetroDad: Earning His Doctorate in Daddy?"
Posted by: Denver Dad | February 16, 2007 at 03:11 PM
How about "Alt-Daddy"?
Posted by: Jenny | February 16, 2007 at 03:22 PM
I'll have to think about it. My question is, do you want "MetroDad" to be in the title or not?
Posted by: Melissa | February 16, 2007 at 03:33 PM
Frank. Simple and to the point.
Posted by: meg | February 16, 2007 at 03:41 PM
If it's any consolation, I'm a working mom and NONE of those parenting magazines speak to me either!
Congrats on the Babble gig. I haven't quite decided what to make of it but I'm glad you're going over there.
Posted by: Lindsay | February 16, 2007 at 03:45 PM
Long time reader, first time commenting. Thanks for my daily laughs!
How about "Breeder's Blog"?
Posted by: taya | February 16, 2007 at 03:49 PM
I just have to be there.
Dadzilla
Fishing in the dark
growing up Dad
Posted by: JG | February 16, 2007 at 03:53 PM
if you were a Windows guy, going off of Jenny's idea, it could be
Control-Alt-Daddy
Posted by: planet3rry | February 16, 2007 at 04:02 PM
No name ideas, but congratulations! I look forward to reading.
Posted by: Rachel | February 16, 2007 at 04:06 PM
"Secret Asian Dad"
That's all I got.
Posted by: candace | February 16, 2007 at 04:40 PM
Peanut Sauce.
Posted by: LOD | February 16, 2007 at 04:59 PM
Okay, I'll be back with more later but I had to share this one real quick:
Metrodad II: The blogeninng
Posted by: Desiree | February 16, 2007 at 05:04 PM
Daddy Said So
You'll Get Nothing and Like It
Whatever the title, the content is sure to be great! Congrats!
Posted by: Kristi | February 16, 2007 at 05:32 PM
Dad Gone Bad
The MetroLine
Le Metro
Scotch and Kimchee
Papa's Got a Brand New Blog
Posted by: margalit | February 16, 2007 at 05:38 PM
"Secret Asian Dad"
Posted by: candace | February 16, 2007 at 05:51 PM
I'm not all that creative...I wish I could help...Good luck and congrats on your new blog...I'll be sure to be a regular reader!
Posted by: Janet a.k.a Wonder Mom | February 16, 2007 at 05:58 PM
I like "Life, Love, and the Peanut Chronicles" that Roger suggested.
Posted by: Gayle | February 16, 2007 at 06:17 PM
Batter up! (Mets fans, there's not reasoning with them)
Peanut's (tell the Schultz estate's flying monkeys [aka IP lawyers] it is about your daughter and an implied possesive)
Scotch & Pull-ups
MBP makes family
Posted by: rwc | February 16, 2007 at 06:17 PM
congrats!
Adventures of BBQ Dad
Peanut and Friends
Peanut and Dad and diapers, oh my!
Posted by: jen | February 16, 2007 at 06:33 PM
i vote for "loofahs, bottles of scotch, and witty banter"
but then, you already thought of that (kind of), so i think that puts me out of the running.
congrats man! can't wait to read the new babble blog. you guys rock.
Posted by: Jonathon | February 16, 2007 at 06:33 PM
If the wicked sense of humor is what sets you apart, how about "Father Knows Jest"?
Posted by: Unstrung Harpy | February 16, 2007 at 07:03 PM
Hey MD,
How about:
"Dad-libbing"
with Pierre Kim.
NYC father making it up (and blogging about it) as he goes along the road of parenthood. Urbane, profane, and off the chain.
or maybe
"From the Peanut Gallery" with Pierre Kim
or
"Daddendum"
or even
"MetroDaddendum"
That's all I got right now. Congratulations on the new column, will definitely read. Cheers
Posted by: Mike | February 16, 2007 at 07:32 PM
I liked one of your titles earlier:
My Kid Farted On Your Honor Student.
or:
The Peanut's Wet Willy
Other than that, I got nuthin'. Congrats and good luck though!
Posted by: samantha Jo Campen | February 16, 2007 at 07:40 PM
MD,
Congrats on the Babble deal.
Does this mean that we'll have yet one more place to look for your witty banter?
Title (not great, but WTF, here goes):
Metrorean - An Asian-American Perspective To Urban Parenting
Posted by: LeeMarvin | February 16, 2007 at 07:45 PM
Congrats! If the other writers are your caliber it will be an amazing read.
I'm in a Friday afternoon postprandial state, so I don't have anything out of the ballpark:
"Straight with Chaser"
"Metrolicious"
"Dry-aged and upstaged"
Posted by: OTRgirl | February 16, 2007 at 07:47 PM
i like so many of the titles already mentioned! mine feel kinda weak in comparison but here goes:
PKNY: the peanut collection
MetroDad: on the rocks (or neat, however you drink your scotch)
and your tagline could be: because I'm asian and can drink your ass under the table
i wish i felt more creative! congrats!
Posted by: pnuts mama | February 16, 2007 at 09:40 PM
Congratulations on the Babble blog!
In terms of the contest, lessee (since I really AM craving a hotdog):
-Peanutty
-Just Babble Baby!
-My Baby Daddy
-MetroDad's Primary Cure
As usually, I got nuthin'
Posted by: honglien123 | February 16, 2007 at 09:42 PM
Oops, My Baby Daddy is pretty much taken. My bad.
Posted by: honglien123 | February 16, 2007 at 09:47 PM
Daddylicious
Who's Your Daddy??
Posted by: EE | February 16, 2007 at 10:00 PM
Egad! Bad Dad!
(But that's lifted from a Calvin & Hobbes strip. Plus, I don't think it suits you?)
Posted by: Wayne | February 16, 2007 at 10:47 PM
I'm kind of partial to
From Here to Paternity though it does sound like an impending lawsuit, so let me give it a whirl...
Please Pass the Scotch
Vacuum-sealed for Freshness
Carpe Dadem
So I Was Thinking While I Was on the Toilet...
That's it. Weak I know. I just felt I had to contribute.
Posted by: mammaloves | February 16, 2007 at 11:18 PM
tagline idea: Word to Your Mother.
Posted by: nonlineargirl | February 17, 2007 at 12:43 AM