Last week, BossLady had a date with one of her gay male friends. They met up after work, went shopping at Barneys, shared a salad for dinner, and then went to see a late showing of "The Devil Wears Prada."
At the same exact time, I was eating a sandwich over the kitchen sink in my underwear, drinking a glass of scotch, watching the Mets game, and training the dog to catch peanuts with his mouth.
This really couldn't have worked out better and there's a good
chance that, for the rest of my life, I will never again have to walk into a
shoe store or go to the ballet. I've told the BossLady that anytime she and John want to do this again, I'll pay for everything.
Why didn't I think of this sooner?
Is it wrong if what you did sounds like way, way more fun to me?
Posted by: Meg | July 31, 2006 at 03:36 PM
How do I find a gay friend for my wife?
Posted by: Brent | July 31, 2006 at 03:39 PM
I laughed aloud in a crowded restaurant here and I was hesitant to explain why to anyone.
Posted by: Busy Mom | July 31, 2006 at 03:45 PM
That image will forever be etched into my mind, thank you.
My wife has several gay friends, but they're not good shoppers. So I have to take my wife shopping and help her pick out the clothes.
Talk about metrosexual.
Posted by: papa2hapa | July 31, 2006 at 03:52 PM
What is it with men eating over the sink? My husband does that all the time. It drives me nuts!
Posted by: Susie | July 31, 2006 at 03:53 PM
If BossLady's gay friend even needs to go out and BossLady isn't available, let me know!
haha.
Very funny, MD.
:)
AM
Posted by: AlieMalie | July 31, 2006 at 03:54 PM
I just spit up when I read the title of your post. "A Fairy Home Companion"? Sounds like one of those knockoff porno flicks. Like "Drilling Miss Daisy" or "Forrest Hump"!
Posted by: Ian | July 31, 2006 at 03:57 PM
(Great title, btw) Although I'm the one who drinks scotch, walks around in underwear, and eats over the sink in the Nabi residence, I draw the line at watching the Mets play. And we don't have a dog. Does this mean I should find me a gay friend for PN?
Posted by: Mama Nabi | July 31, 2006 at 04:20 PM
Our wife's must have the same gayfriend. Except she goes out dancing with him sometimes.
He can dance. I can breakdance.
Posted by: Tony | July 31, 2006 at 04:22 PM
Mmmmm Scotch!
Posted by: Peter | July 31, 2006 at 04:37 PM
And where was The Peanut? Out with the Hilton Sisters somewhere?
Posted by: JJ Daddy-O | July 31, 2006 at 04:53 PM
I was saddened beyond despair when my wife's best friend moved to the City to pursue his dancing career.
As children they would sing 'I got you babe' as a duet with my wife doing the Sonny part. Jimmy had his own lashes by twelve.
Whenever she sees him again I have to spend a week listening to her again because she rediscovers that men have ears.
It saddens me.
Posted by: Pickle's Papa | July 31, 2006 at 05:32 PM
Hmm, maybe you're on to something there. Although--shared a salad? That seems a step too far to me. (on the food limitation side, not the grossly eating something that fell out of your partner's mouth side.)
Posted by: landismom | July 31, 2006 at 07:24 PM
What Pap2hapa is leaving out is the fact that *he* likes to shop. I hate it. He's bought or picked out most of my clothes for the last decade. I would gladly lend him my best gay friend to go shopping if he ever asked. I'm sure they'd come back with great shoes.
Posted by: Didi | July 31, 2006 at 07:36 PM
My lovely wife is taking Yoyo to Sydney to visit Grandma & Grandad this week. It was supposed to be for 3 days, but it has turned into 10. Drinking scotch and eating over the sink is great for a night, or even a weekend, but I shudder to think how far I will have devolved by the time they get back...
I'm thinking "caveman"...bones strewn around the floor...open fire in the living room...that sort of thing...
Posted by: IFLYG | July 31, 2006 at 07:51 PM
I have a post up now about my own extramarital boyfriend. Every gal needs one.
Question: will you pay for our dates, too?
Posted by: kara | July 31, 2006 at 08:55 PM
Every wife should have a boyfriend.
Posted by: MIM | July 31, 2006 at 09:03 PM
A gay male friend is like a little black dress--every woman needs one.
Posted by: Pattie Lee | July 31, 2006 at 10:33 PM
One good thing about my move is that I will be closer to my boyfriend, who lives in Hoboken--YAY! Every wife should be a fag hag.
Posted by: misfithausfrau | July 31, 2006 at 11:00 PM
One of my closest friends in the world is gay. We've been friends for 20 years. However, when it comes to fashion, shopping or chick flicks, he's totally usess. On the other hand, my husband can spend days at the mall, loves the opera, and is always asking me to split a salad. Go figure!
Posted by: Leora | July 31, 2006 at 11:18 PM
We are the hottest thing since organic foods. And we just recruited Lance Bass.
Seriously, I'm glad you all have learned the benefits of the occassional separate dates nights. They are good for both genders.
Posted by: Hygiene Dad | July 31, 2006 at 11:18 PM
One more gay reader here, MetroDad! Just wanted to say that we LOVE going out shopping with our married female friends. Most of the time, we can convince the husbands to pay for our lunches and our spa treatmnents! Thanks.
Posted by: Charles | July 31, 2006 at 11:26 PM
I miss my GMF too. I used to have one when I was in the work force (oh, how 6 years have flown by!)and he even knew how to decorate! Sadly, he moved to Phoenix with his beau to open, you guessed it...an interior design company. Oh, how I miss those 2 hour lunches and free design advice!
Posted by: Waya | July 31, 2006 at 11:30 PM
Mama and I are laughing out loud at this right now.
Maybe you can train MetroDog to fetch beer and hot dogs. Then you can take him to the games while BossLady is out, and you'll never miss a play.
Posted by: Papa Bradstein | July 31, 2006 at 11:51 PM
Dude...not ALL gay men are really gay.
I am going to send you an email.
Posted by: Mike | August 01, 2006 at 04:16 AM
Did the dog learn the new trick?
Posted by: William | August 01, 2006 at 08:11 AM
roflmao! You go guy. Apparently you have discovered what all too few straight men understand. The gay male friend can free you up for more beer and football time ;^)
Posted by: NursePam | August 01, 2006 at 10:42 AM
I'm uncertain whose night sounds better.
Posted by: Mega Mom | August 01, 2006 at 12:59 PM
Do you have one for me too? I'd like a shopping, ballet companion too. Maybe BossLady can share him on her nights out at the Met Game with you...
How did you teach your dog to do that? How much do you charge to train puppies?
Posted by: Janet | August 01, 2006 at 02:43 PM
and to think Wood got jealous when I clung to the back of my lesbian best friend while we drove up to Marin on her harley after our last softball game. that's all the physical contact there was, I swear, other than that half hour we spent trying to see who could punch the other's shoulder the hardest.
Posted by: dutch from sweet juniper | August 01, 2006 at 02:49 PM
I'm sure that my husband would pony up cash money for a Wife's Fairy Companion.
Puts a new spin on Mother's Little Helper...
Posted by: Her Bad Mother | August 01, 2006 at 04:35 PM
gay guys make THE best girlfriends i've had one since junior high. i recommend everyone go get one right now.
Posted by: leahpeah | August 01, 2006 at 05:19 PM
I think it's hilarious that heterosexual male paradise involves being at home in one's underwear! And the stereotypical heterosexual female paradise is going out shoppping and to a movie. Hahaha...
Posted by: Kristen | August 01, 2006 at 10:29 PM
Oh you're soooooo butch, MD.
Now why don't you tell us what kind of underwear it was. I'm thinking...boxer briefs?
Posted by: Mom101 | August 01, 2006 at 10:49 PM
Just caught up reading your blog after 3 weeks away.
Unfortunately, the gay pal thing doesn`t always work the other way around. For instance, when I want to go get a pedicure, sip wine and gossip with a girlfriend, I can`t send my husband to hang out with our lesbian friends, to listen to Melissa Ethridge and talk about their feelings....
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