Fahrenheit 119

Tomorrow, I'm leaving for a business trip to Vietnam.

This is the first long business trip I've taken since the Peanut was born and I can't really say that I'm looking forward to it.  For starters, I haven't even left yet but I already miss her and the BossLady. I'm dreading the 23-hour transit time.  I'm convinced that I'm either going to get malaria or the Avian flu.  And I'm definitely not looking forward to the insufferable heat and humidity.  According to Accuweather, it's going to be over 119 degrees while I'm there!  My balls start dripping with sweat just THINKING about it! (Nice mental image, eh?)

However, I will admit that there's a small part of me that's looking forward to the trip.   Over the course of my life, I've visited over 38 countries.  Every place is uniquely different and I love immersing myself in the culture of new locales.  Vietnam, in particular, is an amazingly beautiful place and photos don't even begin to do it justice.  If you ever get the chance to journey around SE Asia, take it.  The scenery can be absolutely breathtaking.   

I'm also looking forward to flying First Class.  I've upgraded with miles in the belief that if you're going to fly for 23 hours, it's imperative to have a small team of Vietnamese men massaging your feet as long-legged female flight attendants hand-feed you caviar and pour champagne down your throat.  (I'm kidding.  They don't really pour champagne down your throat.  It's actually non-vintage sparkling wine. Cheap-asses!)

Anyway...before I got married five years ago, I used to spend about 20% of the year living out of my suitcase.  I'd fly from New York to London to India to Korea to Hong Kong to Thailand to Shanghai...and then reverse course and do it again.  Often times, my head would be spinning and I'd reach a point where I'd forget what city I was in or where I was even staying.  I'd dig into my pocket to find a hotel key card, only to find about 10 of them.  I'd go to Room #1020 in one city, forgetting that was the room I was booked in 5 days and 2 continents ago. It might sound chaotic but I loved every second of it.

After I got married, I began traveling a lot less.  I'd do everything possible to shorten the time that I was away from BossLady.  Once, I even travelled to Asia for 2 days of meetings and then rushed back home to be with my lovely wife.  I didn't think it was physically possible but I actually spent more time in the air than I did on the ground. 

When the Peanut was born?  Forget about it.  I haven't gone overseas for work since the day she arrived.  The last thing I wanted to do is be away from her because of business.  For the first year of her life, I was only semi-joking when I'd tell people that if I was gone for even a single day, the Peanut would completely forget what I looked like and wouldn't remember me when I came home. 

You never hear much about the feelings that fathers have about traveling and being away from their families.  You hear about the moms being left alone at home to manage the household by themselves. You hear about working moms being forced to go on business trips.  And you hear about working moms engaged in the struggle between careers and parenting.   But the travails of working fathers having to leave their families at home is rarely ever discussed.  As my buddy Brian has astutely discussed, this seems to be another arena in which the "family vs. work" balances of the working father tend to be dismissed.  I'd bitch and complain too but, really, who would listen?  Besides, as the Peanut's Godfather likes to say to everyone, "stop bitching with your high-class problems!"

As for all of you readers out there?  Strangely enough, I'm really going to miss all of you and your blogs too!  You know I love corresponding with all of you and visiting your sites on a regular basis.  It totally bums me out that we won't be able to "keep in touch." 

But, in my absence, I've got a few surprises for you that I think you'll enjoy...

(1) The infamous and beautiful BossLady has finally agreed to do her long-awaited guest post while I'm away.  Many of you have been leaving comments for the past year, hounding her to make a cameo appearance.  Stay tuned to read her debut.

(2) The brilliant filmmaker and hilarious writer, MetroBro, will also be making a short cameo at some point next week.  He's currently shooting a documentary series for CourtTV but, since he's a functional insomniac, he figures he'll write something in his sleep and throw it up here next week.

(3) We'll also have a guest post by a famous celebrity.  I'm not going to say who it's going to be.  Just make sure to come back here and check. 

Finally, in passing, I'm going to take a page out of my buddy Chris' blog (aka Rude Cactus) and open up my comments for questions---anything you want to ask, anything you want to know.  Ask me anything!  Personal, trivial, insightful or meme-licious?  I'll try to post all the answers up here at some point during my trip.  It's going to be a really long fucking plane ride.  Let's try and get to know each other a little better, ok? 

And as my good friend, The Doctor, likes to say..."Later, bitches!  I'll miss you!"

 

Comments

[Leora]

Oh no, MD! You're leaving us? What am I going to do? I do have to admit that I'm very excited to hear from BossLady and MetroBro. Should be fun! Have a safe trip!

[Leora]

Forgot to submit a question...

Do you speak fluent Korean? What language was spoken at home with your parents when you were growing up?

[Pepa]

Oh, yessssssssss!
Bosslady cameo is coming!!
Are you aware of the female danger that you are gonna create???? Jajaja!
Take Care!!
Regards from Madrizz(Spain)
Bye!!

[David]

I want to know where to get the best Pho soup in saigon.

[Mr. Big Dubya]

Dude - safe trip and safe home. Looking forward to reading both BossLady and MetroBoy- suweeet.

Ok - three questions - kinda.

What was in the trunk of the car in Repo Man?

What was in the briefcase in Pulp Fiction?

Are they one in the same?

[Mr. Big Dubya]

And, um, yeah - having trouble shaking the image of sweaty Korean balls. Fantastic.

[misfithausfrau]

Are you going to keep a Food Diary or will the temperatures of Phlegethon keep you from wanting to eat?

Safe travels and Hurry Home!

[AlieMalie]

Think of it in Celsius and it's not quite as overwhelming. 50C. Oooh. Maybe I was wrong about that. Nevertheless, enjoy your trip, international travel is always exciting.

Sooo ... questions, eh? Hmm ... if you could choose what to come back as in your next life - anything! anything at all! - what would you choose and why?

[Melissa]

Ok, so yes, bad mental image. Alhtough my uncle just came back from Vietnam a few weeks ago and said the same thing. He was there for business and has been 6 times in the past 8 months. And while I know he has trouble leaving his wife and kids. I know he loves it. He, as a white american man is condsidered wonderful there. Well.. he is here too, but not generally to random strangers. He always tells the greatest stories. I hope you have a great time, even though you will be away from your lovely wife and child. I think flying first class is a great idea. I will miss you. But I will keep checking back, cause I can't wait to hear what BossLady has to say. "See" you soon.

[Kemp]

Dude... thanks for loading me up with that image. I could have gone my whole life without that one.

Seriously though; have a safe trip. For the flight, I would, as Barney would say on HIMYM; 'iPod up!'

And I'll keep a vigil for the upcoming blog-cameos.

Later

[Anne Glamore]

Having just spent almost 2 days flying back from Nairobi, let me assure you that those upgrades are WELL worth it.

2d tip-- AIRBorne tablets that you dissolve in water. I really think they keep you well. I used 3 tubes on my trip.

3d tip-- Of course, take pictures of Peanut and Boss Lady with you to look at when you start to miss them. It really helps.

4th- I faxed my boys from Kenya (when I found a place that had the ability to do so). A postcard took 3 weeks (still hasn't arrived) but a fax could communicate to them when I couldn't get to a phone. I guess Peanut's a little young to appreciate a fax, but it would be a good keepsake for her.

Have a great trip.

[Meg]

Good lord. I don't spend 23 hours doing anything except BREATHING.

Safe travels to you... and looking forward to the guest posters. And all the Peanut will do is miss you...

[Brent]

Bon voyage, MD. Have a great trip! I'm insanely jealous.

Questions: Who would play you and Bosslady in the TV version of your life? Who's your favorite sitcom character of all time? And if you were on "Lost," who would you be friends with?

[weigooksaram]

I'm envious. I would go to Vietnam just for the food. I know you'll have fun, even though you'll miss your family.

I'm looking forward to reading the BossLady's post.

[Jason]

Bring back our POW's. And some pho.

[landismom]

Have a safe trip, MD! I'm excited to 'meet' the BossLady.

If you could be any fictional character, who would you be and why?

[sweatpantsmom]

Yo, who you callin bitches?

Have a great trip!

(Have you been to Q Bar? It's owned by my ex-studio mate, David Jacobson. Say hi for me and TELL HIM ABOUT MY BLOG.)

[p-man]

I had meant to ask "boxers or briefs", but in light of the image you have provided, it seems redundant. I now imagine you as either commando or kilted. (I love the feel of hot wool in the morning...)

[DP]

Dude! I have to say I'm really going to miss reading your blog on a somewhat daily basis. Have an awesome trip (I've always wanted to go to the Far East; past India, that is)!

Two questions for you: 1) If you could have a super power, what would it be? and 2) If you were given ONE DAY to do something that may be humanly impossible for you to do in this lifetime, what would it be?

Have a safe trip! (it'll be cool to finally "meet" the wife too!)

[Kristen]

So much to say, so little time.

Bad on the balls, MD. I love ya, but SWEATY BALLS? eek. :)

Get the airborne - and a personal fan of some sort. 119 degrees is hot, even for a Korean (heh).

AND, dude, why did you give away that I'm posting for you while you're gone. (heheheh) - and I'm NOT the bosslady or his brother TYVM.

[Linda B]

23 hours? Egads. Drink up!

In all seriousness, have a safe trip. I know it'll be really hard to be away from BL and the Peanut. I agree that not many people consider the toll it takes when the father travels away from the family, rather focusing on the mother and how she is "doing it alone". Trust me I've been living that life for about a year now, with my husband traveling extensively for his job. I brush off the sympathy from people because I realize if my husband had a choice, there would be no way he would choose to be away from us (esp our daughter) for 10 days at a time. When he'd call home to check in, he could hear E in the background asking "Daddy? Daddy?" I could practically hear his heart crushing into tiny, little pieces.

The last time he went on one of his longer trips, he took along his webcam and we were able to chat a few times. It took a little maneuvering on both ends with the time change and our early bedtime here, but it was really worth it.

Eager to read posts by BossLady and MetroBro.

[Deanna]

I have to go find a very strong chemical to wash that image out of my head. Crap, I don't drink! This is going to be bad...

Having been to 38 countries, give me the top 5 that you would take the Peanut to when she's old enough to appreciate it and why/what you want her to see. I know that I'm personally looking forward to traveling with my kids (when they are old enough and potty trained) to show them the world, so I'd appreciate your opinion on it (I've only been to Mexico, Canada, and Japan, and the first two countries barely count). Safe travels, MD.

[euphrosynely]

So you've been to crappy boring Belgium but not to beautiful fun Holland? Shame on you! ;) You should definitely come and visit with BossLady and Peanut, everyone loves Holland!

I went to do that visited country map, and amazingly I've been to 32 countries. And I just turned the tender age where you can legally drink in the States. Hope to add 100 countries more after graduation this June!

Enjoyed this post, as always, and I have just one question for you:
How come your parents gave you a French first name? Most, if not all Korean-Americans I've met all have very American first names: Steve, Dave, James, etc. As I asked before in your previous entry, were your parents Francophone?

[Sheryl]

"stop bitching with your high-class problems!" for some reason that totally cracked me up. I'm going to say that all the time. Have a great time, although geez 119, and humid too, egads. Looking forward to hearing from the Boss Lady, and I may be back with a question.

[JJ Daddy Baby Momma]

But it's a dry heat......BLABAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Laura]

That's so weird - my husband is leaving for Hanoi tonight!

[Pattie]

Good sell on the blog posts coming up in your absence. I'll definitely be checking those out.

I can relate to MetroBro, although I'm jealous that he's a functional insomniac whereas I'm only a mostly-functional insomniac. I'm jealous. And tired.

Travel safe!

[Mike]

Do you think BossLady will find my insights into Korean culture and sometimes Korean women interesting? Or shold I just do all the namjas a favor and shut it?

[Heather]

My question: if you and BossLady went on Trading Spouses or Wife Swap, what kind of family would the show pair you with? (If your high-class problems have kept you from watching, just think complete opposite.)

[Heather]

My question: if you and BossLady went on Trading Spouses or Wife Swap, what kind of family would the show pair you with? (If your high-class problems have kept you from watching, just think complete opposite.)

[Heather]

Sweet! Double comment!

[IFLYG]

Have a great trip, MD - really looking forward to hearing from BossLady, MetroBro, and I'm trying to guess who your mystery celebrity guest might be...a Baldwin? Samuel "Screech" Powers? Tony Robbins?
In the words of Kelly Bundy: the mind wobbles...

[margalit]

I'm going to miss you when you're gone, but I'm looking forward to the guest postings. I just hope that Boss Lady does more than one engagement.

I have two questions:

What are you bring me back from Vietnam (I do love pressies)

What do you actually DO for a living? I don't think I've ever read the answer. Or maybe I have but I'm such an insomniac that I no longer have any memory at all.

Oh, and Saigon does have internet cafes, so please bring a camera and download pics of your trip.

[mo-wo]

Have a good trip and bring the Peanut home somethin' nice. My daddy travelled a lot when I was small.. hell he is off on business next week and that is totally screwing up my babysitting supply.. Nothing changes! What about me? GAWD..still thank you for this opportunity to regress.

You are right to think about the issues of your travel it isn't easy on the family.. Dads for sure. My Mom used to do all kinds of loony reno shit too when my dad would go away which drove him crazy.

[the weirdgirl]

Have a good trip MD! I hear you about missing the Peanut. Keen was DYING when he had to travel and everyone kept asking ME how I was doing. (I was hanging out with the kid watching movies and being a bum.) I think the dads aren't given enough credit in that department.

And here's my question: What liquid do sweaty Korean balls really drip? I have it on good authority that it is not actually sweat. Can you enlighten us?

[MetroBro]

Answers to Mr. Big Dubya's questions:

1. See #3.
2. See #3.
3. Yes. See Robert Aldrich's '50s film noir KISS ME DEADLY.

Now I've got one for you: Why are you posting these questions here? This ain't Metro Movie Trivia Man Blog. You're lucky I stopped by. As for the sweaty Korean balls, I can't help you. I get 'em too.

[AdventureDad]

Hey MD,

Have a nice and safe trip. I need to start counting how many countries I've been to. It's quite a few but I'm afraid it's not 38. Any plus points if all of the trips are vacation only?:-)

Take care

AD

[Godfather]

MD,
Have a safe trip and stick to the fish while you're over there. Looking forward to seeing BossLady and MetroBro's posts. Keep on keepin' it real....

[bill]

I am looking forward to the guest posts.

I travel a bit with work as well and The minute I leave the house (Knowing I won't be back for a few days)I get a sense of dread. I miss my son immensely. I know what you mean.

[Emily]

Be safe, have fun...um...good luck on...the ball thing(what is it when men and their balls? You never hear a woman thinking "Wow, its so hot my cooch is gonna be all sweaty") ;)

Lookin forward to Meeting BodssLady. :)

[kara]

Be safe, have fun!

Question... I would like to know what you actually do for a living (soembody else said that). Hmmm- how 'bout your most interesting brush with death or the law (or both). Take care.

[MGJ]

Yea, a Bosslady post! Can't wait to "meet" the woman behind Metrodad.

Question-Do you think you're going to be overprotective of the Peanut when it comes time for her to start dating?

[A. Tsai]

Have safe travels, MD.

My question to you is whether you're ever going to unveil yourself to your readers. From the few masked photos you've shown of yourself, my girlfriend is convinced you're the spitting image of Daniel Dae Kim. I think she's got an internet crush on you!

[enygma]

You won't have to worry about the Avian flu as long as you eat plenty of kimchee! I'd post a link to the article, but I'm to lazy to google it. Anyway, have a great time in Vietnam, even though you have to work.

[Multymfoiled]

MD -- thanks for the email back, and have a safe trip overseas! Make sure Bosslady emails you lots of photos of the little one while you;re gone -- I'm amazed at how quickly Vampbaby changes every over a few days away...

[Raj]

You seem like you've managed to transition into fatherhood pretty easily. Any tips for a new guy? My wife is expecting our first child in 3 weeks!!!

[Tawnya]

Have a great trip! I know you'll miss Peanut like crazy but try to really enjoy yourself!
Looking forward to the guest posts!

[Meredith]

Yeah, you Dads don't get much credit for what it's like for you to be separated from your family.

Joe was gone for three weeks recently and I worried that Eli wouldn't remember him. They are fairly adaptable, these little ones. But he did and life was good again. But Joe felt like a rift had grown between them.

He feels the rift weekly too. On MOnday evenings after work Eli can't WAIT to see him. By Friday, it's like who's this guy again? It breaks his heart...

Enough about me. Enjoy the food in Vietnam and if you ever have work here in Okinawa, you've got a place to stay.

As for a question,do you make your kim-bap with or without spam? What exactly do you roll up in it?

Also, I do still wonder if you want me to be your exotic kit-kat supplier. It's an option.

Safe travels, friend.

[Mom101]

You will very much be missed (by me) but I wish you safe and wonderful journeys with very adequate sparkling white wine product. I'll take the guest posters all have the MetroDad seal of approval, and that's good enough for me.

And yes, you're right about a dearth of gtw-dad stories out there. Good thing you'll have plenty of time to write your (NYT magazine) article on the plane.

[Kellie]

Hey Metro, we went to Vietnam for a holiday last July. Leaving the cold Sydney winter (most days around 15 degrees celcius) to arrive in Saigon at 38 degrees (100F) and 85% humidity, I nearly begged to get back on the plane! But I loved it, what an amazing country.