Blogging is hard, hard work!

You know, this blogging thing used to be a whole lot easier.  Back in the day, I'd just pour myself a scotch, sit on the couch, ruminate about my impending fatherhood and crank out a post in about 15 minutes.  Of course, there was no pressure to write anything because the only two people on the planet even reading this blog were me and the BossLady (and back then, I'm not even sure SHE was reading it all that much.)

Originally, this site was just supposed to be a place where I could throw down some thoughts, work some shit out and find a community of like-minded men.  It was going to be a place where, for posterity's sake, I could track my transition into fatherhood and chronicle the love I have for my daughter.  But somewhere along the line, I started just talking about whatever was on my mind.  And by opening up other sides of myself, I found an even wider community of people that I could relate to.  Some were older, some younger, some with kids, and some without. And as I've said before, I've found it all to be so amazingly cool.  And I'm continually surprised at how rewarding I find blogging to be.  As most of you know, I love going back and forth with you, checking out your blogs, e-mailing with you and grooving on all the various perspectives we each bring to the table.

But now, I've somehow picked up a wider audience and garnered a small following.  And though that was never my intent, you know what's the coolest part of having a wider readership? I get actual hate mail now.  That's right, friends.  Some people will actually take time out of their own day to sit down and type me a nasty note, telling me what a conceited asshole I am.  Some e-mails are just plain idiotic.  Several are borderline racist.  Not only that, but on a good day, I'll even get some good old-fashioned personal-attack comments on the site as well (that's why, as some of you have noticed, I've been screening the comments before they get posted to the site.)

Do I understand where it comes from?  Sure, I guess so.  After 37 years here on the planet, I've learned that my cynical demeanor and self-deprecating humor can often rub people the wrong way.  Some people dislike me because they think I'm an overconfident son-of-a-bitch.  Some people think I'm yuppie scum.  And some people just dislike me because I have great hair (want to touch it?  I just washed it this morning.  Silky, isn't it?  Soft too, right?) 

I know that my sarcastic sense of humor can turn people against me.  But God damn it, if that's the cost of trying to change the world, one post at a time, so be it!  I'll just have to learn to live with the consequences.  After all, how can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat!   (That's a joke, people.)

But in all seriousness, I don't take the hate mail or nasty comments too seriously.  After all, they don't know the real me.  They only know the persona of MetroDad.  I like to think there's more to me than what I share on this blog.  I'm not sure whether that's actually true...but I like to think so. 

For instance, do you know that when I'm not blogging, I cry?  Really, I cry a lot.  And I dance.  And I sleep in the fetal position.  I'm so sensitive that some of my friends call me Wilma.  OK, none of that's true.  But I'll tell you one thing.  There's a lot of pressure in keeping up a blog.  Especially one that carries the responsibility of representing fathers in the blogosphere (and now that Summerland has been canceled, I'm carrying the gay demo as well.)

But really, I strain more muscles at home writing this blog than I ever did playing sports.  You know why?  It's called commitment, baby.   

In actuality, I like to think that this site is just a place where I can meet interesting new people from all over the world (and Jersey too!)  It's a place where we can hang out, shoot the shit, get into some discussions every once in awhile and have some good laughs together.  As my good friend Jason put it recently, a blog is like a house.  When you comment on someone else's blog, you're a guest in their house. If you're a guest, mind your manners.

So all you playa haters, anonymous commentors and unwelcome dog turds?  I'm not sure what your problem is, but it tastes like chicken.  If you don't like me, my blog or the people who come here, feel free to leave. 

Like the flight attendants always say to me when I get too drunk on the plane ride back from Vegas, "you don't have to go home, sir, but you got to get the heck up outta here!"

Comments are now open. 

 

Comments

[Brent]

I can't believe someone would actually take the time to send hate mail or leave nasty comments. And racist too? That's fucked up, dude. But then again, there are a lot of assholes out there. Just keep doing what you're doing. This blog rocks!

[Melissa]

Damm I can't believe I'm first. I almost never get on the computer at night but my kids are sick and in bed early. MD - Summerland , please tell me you're kidding. There are haters and trolls on evert site, that's how you know people like you. Anyways, I love your sarcastic humor. Keep it up.

[bitemycookie]

you're not much a writer if you're not offending somebody. in this case hate mail is a compliment of the highest order. mazel tov on the big sucksessess metro. blog on.

[ShotgunDaddy]

MD:
Alright, I have to apologize for the hate mail I sent you. When I belittled your institution of higher learning (and higher than what, exactly?), it was all in good fun. Keep your head up, my brother!

[Jen]

MD: I don't have kids, nor even anything close to kids, but I lOVE your blogsite. Almost makes me want to have kids. Only reading your stories about the cute Peanut, and not my upcoming 30th birthday, ticking biological clock or my nagging Korean mother make me want to bust out some rugrats.

Why would people hate? Also, doesn't it take a lot of energy to sent hate mail (yes, I said energy, and Yes, I live in Berkeley)?

[Chocolate Makes it Better]

I really agree with Jason on this, if you don't like what someone has to say.....do another search in google, press the back button, go somewhere else.

This is your space man, if you're like me then you do it for your daughter, if people happen to read your site then that's a bonus.

At least your daughter will be able to say "Gee there where some arseholes back in the early 2000's wasn't there dad?"

[BIYF]

OH for god sakes... just shut the hell up why dontcha! You think you know everything, for crying out loud?!?! Tell me. Just who do you think you are? Mr. Big Stuff? Stupid Russian.

Oh. Wait. Sorry, wrong blog.

[GIRLS GONE CHILD]

I got your back. Fuck with MD, fuck with the Groupiez, yo!

[barbex]

Live from the idocymeter:

Todays density of morons on the internet: quite high.

(Same as yesterday and the day before that, I think we may have a trend here)

Keep up the good work Metro!

[AlieMalie]

People send you hate mail? Geez. I've only been reading for a week or two, but I cannot imagine what in the world they'd send you hate mail for. Must be jealousy.
To hell with 'em.

[mabel]

Idiots, morons, and turds -oh my! People never fail to amaze me. They can be fabulously wonderful...or pathetically repulsive. Sorry you're getting visited by the latter. I love your blog and wish you would post more often. It is like Christmas when I click over to you and you've posted! Really! Have a GREAT day, ignore the haters. What a waste of energy...

[misfithausfrau]

Dude, you're not helping your cause when you make reference to Summerland!

I just love to imagine how worked up someone HAS to feel to actually write hate mail on someone's blog. I mean, they MUST get worked up, right?

Keep fighting the good fight, my friend.

[Mr. Big Dubya]

Man, I apologize - I was trying to send a scathing e-mail to "MetroCad" and wasn't really paying attention. He was bloviating about gramnmar and spelling and something about 37 being the new 25...um....oh, shit...maybe that was you. Sorry.

Keep it up - ya gotta love a guy who will reference Pink Floyd and Summerland in the same post.

You can always send the hate mail my way - I'd be happy to be hated or loved for my posts.

[bill]

Oh there will be some hate mail now, dissing on Jersey, oh nevermind people from Jersey can't read so don't worry about. (Joke).

You are right bloggin is hard work but I love what I get out of it. It is the best hobby I have had so far and it is people like you that make that way.

[Mr. Big Dubya]

Here I am posting about grammar and spelling and I can do neither today - grammar...not gramnmar.

[Bradley]

"I'm not sure what your problem is, but it tastes like chicken." Can I steal that line? It's brilliant!

As a homosexual man, I just want to say that I've been reading your site for months now. I love it and I tell all my friends with kids about it. So there! You've already got the Gay demographic!

(p.s. Us gays never liked Summerland as much as you would have thought!)

[Phat Daddy]

Can we see some of the "best of" and then offer mocking comments on the upbringing and intelligence of the hate mailer? It could be really amusing.

[Xdm]

Sure, you get hate mail, but remember...you also get LOVE mail from strange women who have random, semi-sultry dreams that feature a guy that looks sort of like you in a city that is supposed to be New York but isn't and where a school Bus drives through honking.

[Chris]

We got your back. And think of it this way - you've hit the big time when you start getting hate mail.

[Maggie C.]

Screw the haters, MD. Whatever you do, just make sure you keep on blogging. I'm hooked on your site. Personally, I love your sarcastic sense of humor!

[kara]

i think you have all the charm of a leg-humping dog. but i love you anyway.

[Paulette]

I agree with Mr. Big Dubya, MD. You really gotta love a guy who will reference Pink Floyd and Summerland in the same post. You crack me up. You're like the parenting blogosphere's David Sedaris...but with more New Yawk City attitude and a little more bite. Screw the haters. Just keep on doing your thing. Whatever you do, don't stop blogging!

[Ryan B.]

Another gay reader coming out of the closet here, Metro! I was going to de-lurk on your last post regarding the lost art of the hand job. Clearly, you haven't been spending much time in the gay community. Otherwise, you'd surely know that, in some circles, the handjob is alive and well.

I just wanted to say that I enjoy reading your site (even though I'm single, gay and have no children.) Don't let the haters bring you down. They're all over the place now. You've just got to ignore them and move on! Keep up the great work!

[Linda B]

Hate mail? you've arrived, MD!

I have to agree with you. Blogging is a commitment. One I am not quite committed to, as of late. Heh.

Ok, Summerland has been cancelled?!

[Pattie]

To hell with all the naysayers. You know you've definitely arrived in the blogosphere when your posts spur people to send hate mail (for what I can't imagine). I admire your commitment to blogging, especially since I know how hard it is to blog often, which you do, and you do well. And don't ever lose the sarcasm or self-deprecating humor; they only add to your writing.

Don't worry--all of us MD followers have got your back.

[Mr. Wonderful]

Just remember opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one and most of stink.

You the man

[lesbonstemps]

I think I would be kind of flattered to get hate mail.

No one likes to get snarky comments, but it is one of the hazards of putting yourself out there on the Internet. I don't think the blog/ house analogy really works, because a blog is really a very public thing. If you don't want people to respond then what's the point? And of course not everyone is going to agree with everything you say.

[METRODAD]

Bradley & Ryan,

I was totally kidding about carrying the gay demographic! I had no idea that I even had any gay readers. Suddenly, I'm feeling very fabulous and chic. I feel like I should change into better clothes when I'm blogging now. Or at least, maybe I should redesign this awful-looking site.

Anyway, thanks for "coming out of the closet" and commenting. You guys made my day (and sorry about the Summerland crack. At least, Prison Break is still on!)

All the best,
MetroDad

[Kemp]

I don't get hate mail from my personal blog, but I get it from on my other blog that, shall we say, leans a little liberal.

To attack someone on a personal blog is pretty pathetic and probably says a LOT about that person.

In the words of Bluto from Animal House: "My advice to you is to start drinking heavily."

[Stephen]

I can't imagine what some people would read on your site that would incite them to the point of sending nasty e-mails and comments. You'd think if someone were so offended by a person's personal blog, they'd just choose not to read it. Then again, there are a lot of a-holes out there and you can't please everyone!

Just keep doing your thing, Metro. What I always liked about this site is that I never got the feeling you were pandering for your readers. You just seem to write whatever is on your mind. Keep doing it, dude.

[JJ Daddy in Savannah's Baby Momma]

Has it been happening just over the passed few week's?

I think that peoples are probably redacting to you're firm stand of grammer. Few of we like to have it pointed out that even though we gradiated from college, we're not the exampliary grammarian you is.

[Ed Bacchus]

Keep doing what your doing. Just remember that many of us get you and those that don't, can click to another site. Obviously they don't have anything better to do. I don't have the readership like you, but I guess you just have to have a tough shell and just not be bothered with the negative comments.

[Jennifer]

You? hate mail? Always you will find those that just go a little to far. As for me I am a huge fan. Keep up the good blogging!

[enygma]

I don't understand why people would spend time to actually think and type out hate mail/comment, unless it's something that completely goes against your principles, i.e. religion, racism. Seriously, if you don't like what is written, don't read it! It's worse when the other person stalks you from another site just to send you hate mail.

[RBrown]

Dude! Who could hate a man who calls himself METRODAD, nicknames his child "peanut" admits to watching Summerland probably ues Kerastasse on his hair and drinks Scotch? You've covered every base for God's sake and I know you did it without even trying. You're just you. Cool, wonderful Metrodad.

I guess hate mail IS a compliment...it means your bloggomittment is paying off.

What incited such hate? Was it the blog about the muppets? Because come on, that'll just break my heart...

You rule, MD.

[Matthew]

This is why I aspire to be like MetroDad. He gets hatemail and then everyone sends him the love.

I'm feeling so gooey inside right now.

(And there's nothing wrong with a little crying, btw.)

[landismom]

Well, I feel totally vindicated. I've been hating you for what, seven or eight months now. Finally, my campaign against Metrodad has paid off, and others are starting to see it my way. Mwah-hah-hah!

Okay, all kidding aside, they are foolz. Yes, foolz with a z. But you knew that.

[sharon]

i can't believe you get hate mail. i guess with fame, comes jealousy. anyway, i love your blog so much i syndicated it on lj hahaha 8D

[Jesse James]

Say what you want, I still think you're a fucking asshole!

[gina]

Hmmmm, let's see, an asian metrosexual, clever, full of million dollar ideas, devoted family man with no gaydar.....yup, you gotta be brought down Man! You know I am using the bad grammer just to show you how I feel about ya!

[wendyod10]

You are hilarious - so glad I found you through bitemycookie - 'how can you have any pudding when you don't eat your meat' - niiiiiiiice....lol

[amy]

Hate mail! I am so jealous! That is awesome. I'd love to see some of it.
But I know--isn't blogging fun? And isn't so different than what you thought it would be?

[LeeMarvin]

Metropolitan Dad:

A citizen of a metropolis, especially one who displays urbane characteristics, attitudes, and values...about, for and with fathers.

It IS what we DO that defines us.

Let the haters hate. They can drop it on your doorstep, but they can't make you step in it!

You R Da Man...if it was easy, everyone would be doin' it. Bottom Line: It is what you wanted it to be...you just have more participants that have exceptionally stupid thoughts...

[chunky930]

It's when they stop writing hate mail that you should worry. Why not address some of them in the next mailbag?

[Jon]

The pressure is intense. I carry around a pad of paper to write down all the little events in life that might make an entertaining blog post. This is particularly annoying to my wife in the midst of an arguement.

There are not enough quality "dad" blogs, however yours is one!

[the weirdgirl]

Just let the hate mail roll off your back. On the internet, I don't even think these people are really "worked up"; it's just an easy place for passive-aggressive people to be nasty without feeling guilty about it. (In other words, chickenshits.) I've visited blogs where the whole cycle was about who could make the meanest comments - usually started by the author. What a waste.

[Meg]

Dooce gets tons of hate mail. And look how cool she is! Go with it. Maybe have a hate mail of the week where you publish their email address and IP so that we can all respond accordingly! Awesome!

[DP]

Jealousy is a bitch. At least that's what hate mail boils down to in my book. They're just pissy because they haven't been funny since grade school (and even that didn't count). Keep it up, MD!

[Sandy]

I am not a blog freak, but once in a while I visit my favorite blogs sites and yours is one of them. A lot of times I don't even post comments, but this is the time to let you know I enjoy reading all your thoughts, comments and anything that happens around Peanut. I can totally relate to all that you are living right now. Keep up with the good work. You are doing great!

[Marty]

I'm a little jealous. I wish I had a blog that got hate mail. I'd get a good laugh out of it. It just lets you know that you've arrived as an elite blogger. Merry Fucking Christmas!