Listography: A Life in Lists

I am an inherently lazy writer.

Given the choice between curling up with a good book or sitting down at my computer, I will almost always choose the former over the latter. 

I'm also not very good at managing my free time. I've studied the habits of brilliantly successful people to see if there were some techniques that I might find helpful. Did you know that Buckminster Fuller averaged just two hours of sleep a night for two years and claimed he was more energetic and alert as a result? Or that Honore de Balzac ate dried coffee grounds to stimulate his imagination?

Word is that Socrates even laid out his toga the night before and pre-pinned it in order to save time.

(OK, I made that last one up.)

The only thing that seems to work for me is making daily to-do lists. As you can probably tell, I've always been a big fan of lists. Not only do I always make mental lists in my head, I'm also always annoying friends to give me their lists. ("Who are the 5 hottest sitcom characters of all-time?" "Give me 5 names for your imaginary band." "If you could only eat 5 foods for the rest of your life, what would they be?")

Hmm...now I'm starting to realize why nobody wants to sit in a car with me for more than 3 hours.

Anyway, in lieu of any real writing, here are a few lists I compiled tonight:

The 5 Best Books I've Read In The Past 5 Weeks

1. Nick Hornby's "Juliet, Naked"
2. Lorrie Moore's "A Gate at the Stairs"
3. Stefanie Wilder-Taylor's "It's Not Me, It's You."
4. Colston Whitehead's "Sag Harbor"
5. Michael Lewis' "Home Game"
   

My 5 Favorite Nostalgic Childhood Foods

1. PB & J sandwiches
2. Nesquik
3. Chocolate eclairs
4. Powdered iced tea
5. TV dinners

The 5 Articles Of Clothing I'd Remove From Existence

1. Crocs, Uggs & Birkenstocks
2. Golf Visors
3. Jean shorts (aka "jorts")
4. Cardigan sweater vests
5. Replica NFL jerseys

The 5 Things I'd Take To A Desert Island

1. A Frette blanket
   
2. James Joyces' "Ulysses"
   
3. A case of Sriracha Hot Sauce
   
4. Q-Tips
   
5. The complete works of The Rolling Stones

5 Things That Always Bring Tears To My Eyes

1. Parents outliving their children
2. Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah"
3. The last scene in "Rudy"
4. Seeing awkward kids being shunned by their peers
5. The tears of a loved one

5 Things That Always Bring A Smile To My Face

1. My daughter
2. Jeans and sweater weather
3. The NY Post
4. Reading books by the fireplace
5. Five Guys hamburgers

5 Things That Always Make Me Laugh

1. Jimmy Fallon's "The Housewives of Late Night"
2. People who wear pajamas outside the house
3. Leashes on cats
4. Fat people trying to get into rowboats
5. People walking into glass doors.

5 Best Quotes I Have Recently Read

1. "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." - Soren Kierkegaard
2. "It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men." - Frederick Douglas
3. "If you care about what others think of you, then you will always be their slave." - James Frey
4. "Tina is my baby girl. She’s my sister from another mother of a different color. I’d do 25 to life for her. She is down like four flat tires."" - Tracy Morgan
5. "Age is a very high price to pay for maturity." - Tom Stoppard

That last quote is certainly resonating with me these days. Why? Because in about one week, I will be turning 41. Holy crap! FORTY. ONE. I certainly don't feel 41. What is 41 supposed to feel like anyway? Honestly, I'm not quite sure anymore.

Sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday that I was 16 years old and my biggest worry was where I should sit in the cafeteria or which pair of acid-washed Girbauds I should wear that day.

Ha!

Those were the good old days.

Comments

[Jaime]

Can you move to Montana?

[Mrs. Q.]

Oh, what the heck was peanut for Halloween??

[Selkie]

Dude, I hope you never get Plantar Fasciitis, because then you run the risk of having those hated Crocs be the ONLY shoes you can wear and still be able to walk, even a short distance...

[Kelpy]

Here's something for an Asian flavour

[Kelpy]

http://cherryteq.wordpress.com/

[Mandy]

Suddenly, all I want to do is knit a cardigan sweater vest. Hmmm.

[Angela Giles Klocke]

Good to know I could make you laugh twice - though in my case, I'd probably be in my pajamas outside of home and run into a glass door at the same time, and then trip. :D

[sarabeth]

hey what's up with bosslady? can we get an update?

[Kate (Bee In The Bonnet)]

I just pounded a Five Guys Little Cheeseburger and almost an entire order of fries before I sat down to read this... I have always liked their burgers, but I'm pregnant now, and so NOTHING (not even the realization that my child/ren will be born with lettuce, tomatoes and extra pickles on the side) comes between me and my Five Guys. Mmmm.

And my husband cheered your choice of the complete works of the Rolling Stones. He was thinking he might enjoy visiting your island, but it looks like you lost him with the Joyce inclusion.

[mo-wo]

Wasn't the apple cobbler in a Swansons dinner a spectacular sort of luxury? Sort of used to make me feel 'part American'

[Joe Skeptic]

Good list. Like the James Frey quote, My Friend Leonard is one of my favorite contemporary novels.

And that 41 feeling is mortality. Just do what I do and look away.

[margalit]

Catching up after a month in the hospital. All I have to say about your shoe choices is that if you were a woman, with a size 11EE foot, all you CAN wear are my three favorite shoes: Uggs, Crocs, and Birkenstocks. No, they are ot pretty. They're UGLY as a matter of fact. But the choices are so limited for us Sasquaches, we're THRILLED when a new model of any one of these shoes comes out. Because honestly.... we are the forgotten women.

[tracy]

have you heard of listography.com?

[Sue Laguna-Whang]

Here's my to-do list for today:

1. Feed my kids - baby fat only lasts so long
2. Get some meth - coffee only lasts so long
3. Do some laundry - undies only last so long
4. Clean the house - cockroaches only last so long
5. Talk to my husband - restraining orders only last so long.

[MidwestGal]

What did the Peanut end up being for Halloween?

[Chris]

I want to be buried with Q-tips.

Happy belated birthday. You'll wear 41 well. Age IS a high price to pay for maturity, but I think we've hit a sweet spot in our 40s. It'll feel more comfortable after a few washings. And if it shrinks and feels tight? Just squat.

[An Irish Daddy]

From a Daddy blogger to a fellow Daddy blogger, great site.

There's nothing to be ashamed of in keeping lists. It's part of every Alpha Male's competitive armoury.

It's also good to see we're doing our utmost to raise the profile of Daddys everywhere and reclaiming just a little bit of territory on the small army of Mummy bloggers out there. Check out my blog too if you get a moment to hear things from an Irish perspective.

http://www.anirishdaddy.blogspot.com/

Best,

An Irish Daddy

[Sal]

Damn! There's a HUGE difference between 41 and 43. You'll see...

[leeamm]

You like watching people walk into glass doors huh?
Made me smile just reading it because when I was 6 months pregnant meeting my husbands grandparents for the first time, they have a house out in the country and it was late at night. All his family was sitting in the living room and because there were no lights outside to reflect on the glass I slammed forehead and prego belly first into that sucker and everyone turned and looked.And laughed, and asked me if I was ok, as they continued to laugh. They still talk about it.

[Evan]

Being a teenager rocks, but I'll stick to who and where I am right now: with my two daughters and my wife. :D

[Shannon]

Dude, where are you? Don't leave us hanging.

[Carolyn]

Checking in. Surprised you haven't posted in a while. I hope everything is okay.

[Paula]

I kinda love it that you couldn't limit the fashion to 5, so cheated out the category by clumping all the bad footwear on one line. Maybe you should've done two separate categories---fashion, and shoe specific. Surely there are two more footwear eyesores stomping around out there in our universe.

Also, am a little miffed re: self proclaimed fat person un-bookmarking simply because you think it's funny to see someone big getting in a tiny boat. It is what it is.

[lacoste shoes 2010]

Neither beliver nor reject anything, because any other person has rejected of believed it. Heaven has given you a mind for judging truth and error, Use it. Do you think so?

[Jeff]

You have alot of things that make me smile. I do not stop long enough to do this but, I like alot of the same things.

[Sandra]

You have inspired me to make a few lists of my own. It is easy to get in a rut and not see the good for all the rest of what is going on in you life.

[Kathleen]

This is the only way to live life. I will pattern mine after yours. Thanks for sharing.

[Anamuhie]

priligy buy online usa buy priligy has anyone tried priligy; proscar price buy proscar online proscar for hair loss; buy naltrexone cheap buy naltrexone online meaning of naltrexone

[Atsupurax]

buy priligy in malaysia buy priligy advertencias y precauciones priligy; pharmacy prices proscar buy proscar can i stop taking proscar; naltrexone hcl 50 mg price buy naltrexone no prescription naltrexone my way out

[Asejizup]

buy priligy in uk buy priligy generisches priligy; generic proscar prices buy proscar cutting proscar into 5 pieces; sinclair method buy naltrexone order naltrexone online naltrexone uk