Blogging as a Popularity Contest: I Lose!

I'm often humbled by the sheer number of people who e-mail me regularly asking me to please post here on a more frequent basis.

Being only human, I have to admit that this flattery often feeds the small part of my ego not already being nourished by my overinflated sense of self-esteem and narcissism. Really? You like me? Oh goody!

But as you can probably tell, I don't really write here because I want to be popular. If anything, I think I'd actually prefer a little more anonymity. 

Why?

When you're young, all you care about is having lots of friends. Then, as you mature, you realize there are much more important things in life---like having lots of friends who are less successful than you are.

Just kidding.

I think.

I might have to get back to you on that one.

Anyway, in all seriousness, I admit that this blog has a certain amount of internet-induced popularity that I'm slightly conflicted about it. On the one hand, I don't give a shit about what other people think of me but, on the other hand, I'd really like to be remembered as the guy who didn't care what other people thought of him. I like to call this the "Fonzie Dilemma."

Anyway, part of the reason that I don't blog more regularly is because I don't want this blog to become too popular. As I look around the internet, I see a lot of bloggers who are more overexposed than George Hamilton slathered in baby oil lying on a bed of aluminum foil under a magnifying glass at high noon in Palm Springs. Their constant self-promotion leaves me feeling a little nauseated by the whole thing.

I don't want to be one of those people whose lives becomes obsessed with blogging. I'll never be one who posts every day, comments on hundreds of blogs, and falsely assumes that quantity can trump quality. Traffic and popularity don't mean that much to me. 

I just like hanging out with you guys and shooting the shit.

Anyway, I would like to start posting here a little more frequently. It's just that things have been, as the kids say, "mad crazy." I'm watching my portfolio shrink so quickly that I picture myself spending my retirement greeting people at Wal-Mart. I'm cleaning my apartment so I can see more than 10 square feet of space at any given time. I'm cursing the fact that I bought a car that gets 12 mpg. I'm subsisting solely on meat and cheese. I'm weaning myself off coffee. I'm catching up on 3 months worth of personal e-mails. I'm purposefully losing daily games of Candyland while teaching my daughter how to tie her shoes. And I'm reading five books simultaneously while trying to figure out whether I should keep watching "Fringe," "The Mentalist," "My Own Worst Enemy," and "The Sarah Connor Chronicles."

Oh yeah...I'm also ruminating on the fact that I turned 40 last week!

More importantly, what's up with all of you?

Comments

[Mandy]

You must keep watching The Mentalist. It's good, isn't it? But my reason for liking it (Simon Baker is a hottie) may be different than your reasons for liking it.

[mom101]

Don't worry, you're not actually that popular. I hacked your stats.

[Ka_Jun]

Throwing games of Candyland? Man...me, reading No-No Boy by John Okada; Growing Up Brown by Peter Jamero; back issues of Dirt Rag and dreaming of getting back out on some pristine singletrack after riding in my first XC mountain bike race. Hella stinky at my place, our six month old has had some serious gas the last couple of days. Holy hell, it's like Butterbean had a bender at the local Taco Bell then drank a keg of stale Natty Ice.

[zenoma]

Happy 40th, and many more! You are soooo Fonzie!

Me? Finishing post-grad school, minding 3 kids (2 with ear current infections...the other is a 13 yr old girl which is half-hell in itself), getting back in fighting shape, barely have time for pleasure reading, and I've given up on all but The Mentalist.

Best wishes! (and more Peanut pictures please!)

[girdtmom]

Happy 40th, MD!

There were several torturous months of non-stop Candyland games at my house after the girdt got a set for her fourth birthday this summer. We have since bought her a copy of Viva Topo! and the adults in the household are having much more fun (the girdt loves both games, so it's all good to her). Plus, it's much easier to throw a game than it is with Candyland.

[Janelle]

Happy 40th to the Korean Fonzie! Hope you had a great birthday celebration. Would love to hear what did. My husband's 40th is next year and I want to start planning now. Any ideas?

[Heather B]

I'm glad you wrote this post, MD. Lately I feel like all my favorite bloggers are either angling for some book deal or are spreading themselves too thin all over the web. You're absolutely right. Quality trumps quantity every day of the week. Keep up the great writing!

[scootergrrl]

Happy 40th! Larve your blog 8)

I'm calling your shit out: you don't really purposefully lose at Candyland, do you? If so, isn't that contributing to the whole "nation of pussies" trend toward which you seem so vehemently opposed?

[Craig]

Happy 40th, MetroDad. How does it feel? I'll be there soon and I"m not looking forward to it!

[Rachel E.]

"Anyway, part of the reason that I don't blog more regularly is because I don't want this blog to become too popular."

What odd thinking. But that's probably why I like you - your very oddness is appealing.

I'm not sure you can control the popularity thing. (Didn't you learn anything in middle school?) It just IS. So let it be and enjoy it.

Oh, and happy birthday!

[April]

Well you won't have to worry about "My Own Worst Enemy" since it got supposedly got canceled. Happy Belated Birthday!

[Ally]

I love that you don't post everyday because I have a life too! I read your blog when I can because I can relate (I have an almost 4 year old diva) and I love your humor!

[jeramy]

happy 40th!

....you're not talking about me are you?

who cares....i'm only 31. i've got time left to mature. www.jeramysossaman.blogspot.com

seriously...hilarious!

[Fer]

i vote for fringe...

[Big J Man]

Funny, all of the cars I want get about 12 MPG. You know, the C63AMG, the BMW M3, the CTS-V, the GT-R. Thank god I don't have a very long commute!

By the way, what'd you get?

[Katherine]

MD, I suppose you'll get at least one hour back per week since they canceled My Own Worst Enemy this week. I'm sorry to hear it was one of your favorites! I'm happy to read you, however often you post. Thanks for your humor and grace.

[Nicole P]

All this post did was make me like you more and wish you posted more frequently! Happy belated!

[deeness]

Word on the street is that NBC made the decision for you; you no longer have to watch My Own Worst Enemy.

[always home and uncool]

The ol' "plead that I don't want to be popular to gain more popularity" trick. Well played, MD, well played. Feel free to toss you're unwanted masses, my way.

While you've been gone I've trying to hunt down Aaron Heilman. Literally. Sarah Palin and I have been on the moose-copter. No more bullpen implosions for you, Fightin' Irish flunky!

[anneglamore]

I'm totally watching Sarah Connor because of Shirley Manson. Otherwise I'd have made no effort to figure out what's up with that show. I've got enough to do with the law, the blog, the 3 boys, and the husband.

I've been navigating the junior high and learning some algebra as I help Finn with his homework. I've been training 2/3 of the boys on the use of Stridex pads. Last night I cooked halibut wrapped in prosciutto.

And I've been helping some close friends through rough times. When you're in your 40s, life just gets serious.

[Caroline]

I kind of like the fact that you don't post on a daily basis. I find that those blogs that do tend to get pretty boring most of the time. They become a litany of stories about the mundane details of a blogger's life. Not always that captivating.

[Leslie Ann]

How about instead of blogging more regularly, you just put up more photos of your adorable daughter? I'm as single as they come but I swear, every time I see a photo of her, I want to have kids right away!

[Joscelyne Cutchens]

Happy Birthday! :)
I have just started reading your blog in the last few months and I really love your sense of humor and sarcasm. (do you watch house too?) My hubby and I LOVED the underaged CHinese Gymnast, couldn't stop giggling.

[malinda]

Happy Belated Birthday!

even though I would love to a new post more often... its okay... I know when a new post pops up its going to an excellent read... like saving your favorite candy to eat up last.

[pensive legal alien]

Happy belated birthday MD!

When the frequency with which your posts appeared dropped, I was sorry at first. After a while, however, and especially after this post, I thought: here's another one who can't write a post each night but still loves to post and keep "in touch".

So, good on you. I'm always happy to hear from you - whenever and how often it may happen.

[Holmes]

Hey, happy birthday man! Should I email you that your blog sucks just to balance things out for you? It'll be tough, but I'd do it to help out.

[wn]

...and here I thought you and BossLady might have won the lotto....joined the Korean mob...or maybe moved to Kenya...

I guess I was wrong!

Happy belated birthday....I turned 33 on the 6th as well...getting older sucks donkey balls!

[Waya]

Hey Fonze!! Happy belated b-day!! You sneaked that in the last minute didn't you! I'll follow suit soon, yuck yuck!!

[Mama Nabi]

Oh, Metrodad. You're like freaking Oprah.

There was a popularity contest? And you lost? What?

I do think there is a difference between blogging for shits and giggles (or therapy... whatever) and blogging for a living. To each their own.

You know, you could use your super-powers for good - put some ads on your site and donate the proceeds from your blog to a worthy charity... like food for hungry children, quality make-up for those underaged Chinese gymnasts.

That's what I'd do if I were Oprah... I mean, Metrodad.

[Veerle Herremans]

Happy belated birthday! About the Fringe thing: I don't know if I should keep watching it either. There's something about me that still makes me interested in the series, but the storyline is kinda lame. What else is going on here? Emm well, I'm trying to learn Nina not to touch the cd's, the on/off button of the pc and to stay out of the toilet. Yeah, you see I'm having lots of fun :-).

[I think your're pathetic]

I think you are narcissistic.
I think you write this to say that you are not all about yourself, but really are.
Keep trying.

Good. Now you will get all these posts pumping you up all over again.

[mm22]

hapyy big one, md!! i'm always checking your blog to see what peanut is up to...you, i really don't care about! :)

[Fiona]

Well, you'll be able to cross "My Own Worst Enemy" off the list, since it just got canceled. So one burden is lightened a bit, hooray! I like "The Mentalist", which I decided to follow only cause of that Simon Baker guy whom I've liked since "The Guardian".

Happy belated birthday - the big 4-0, eh? God bless ya!

P.S. I completely get your point about not becoming uber-caught up in the whole blogging thing. The fact that some bloggers actually have business cards is both nauseating and hysterical. Oh the pretentiousness!

[Cindy]

Praying that my husbands non-profit job isn't lost, praying for 3 kids that I know who have been diagnosed with cancer in the past month, recovering from some terrible germ I caught during my first trip to Europe and thanking God that my two girls are happy and healthy - also wondering how much to afford the holidays this year, worrying about the economy and being very thankful the election turned out the way it did and equally as glad it is over.

[Kila]

Just meat and cheese? Are you losing weight? Avoiding the carbs does the trick for me.

HAPPY 40th! Congrats! Woohoo!

Have fun in Candyland! Been busy with Chutes and Ladders over here!

[janet]

Happy 40th, MD! As for us, we're moving out of SF. We can't afford to live here anymore. It's back to the midwest where we have free babysitting whenever we want.

[ang]

You're finer than any aged scotch!! Happy Birthday!!!

I know this is selfish, but I missed you!! yeah, yeah, I know, what have I done for YOU lately - not much. Well, okay, that's not true, I've told ALL of my friends about you. And after reading your latest post, I should have just kept that good thing to myself (and been ULTRA-selfish, something I can still aspire to, eh?).

Thanks for coming back though - now I have something interesting to read while I'm 'homing from work'. I'm kind of sad that the Peanut doesn't slather YOU with lotion and lick it off anymore. . .

Hugs to everyone!

[gennifer]

Amen, MD. I'm getting a little tired of the constant self-promotion that I see from a lot of bloggers. It's getting to be a little too much.

[Kate (Bee In The Bonnet)]

Happy birthday! My favorite husband turned 40 this past summer. And a few weeks after that, he soundly kicked my ass in a 5K race. He just stamped out his cigarette, threw on some shoes and beat the crap out of me after I had been training for months. Asshole. Just saying so because 40 has apparently been pretty awesome for him so far.

And yeah. I have no sort of real internet popularity, but I completely understand feeling less pressure to post than I did when I started blogging a few years back. But looking over my posting habits, I still seem to post pretty regularly, but that's only because I can't shut my f*cking pie-hole in real life, so it only stands to reason that I'd talk way too gaddamn much in blogland, too. As you point out, striving for quality AND quantity is too much for the market to bear. Oh, well.

[Wandering Chopsticks]

Happy Birthday!

I love "The Fringe" too! Also, got hooked on "Eleventh Hour." Have you tried?

[Big Pumpkin]

Happy belated Birthday! It's all downhill from here....no, just kidding! It only gets better!

[Maureen]

Happy 40th!!!!
I love reading your blog and part of the reason is probably because it's like a present when you post. I'll check every couple of days and then when you do post, it's like "Oh goodie!"

I love My Own Worst Enemy!
First show in ages that I've actually tuned into regularly.

[heartatpreschool]

Personally, one of the reasons that I read your blog, is because you don't post frequently, so I can keep up! Ok, so the great writing has something to do with it too, I'll admit it.

[Black Hockey Jesus]

Post twice a month. 95 comments. You're a pimp.

[Matthew]

Dude. You're old.

You forgot to mention that you're also busy agonizing over your fantasy football team.

I used to get caught up in the number of people who visited my blog. Now, I just want to write about my kids and being a dad. Anyone who wants to come along, that's cool.

Oh, and I'd kick your ass at candyland too.

[Ryan]

Let me know how 40 treats you. I get there next year. Happy birthday.

[alice, uptown]

Glad you've got that retirement plan worked out. Problem is, you'll have to move to some god-awful place where they actually have Wal-Marts.

I'm thinking I should have learned plumbing or electrical, some utilitarian skill that can't be outsourced. Meanwhile, all I have is fancy prep school/Seven Sisters white- collar-skills requiring synapses that connect and fire.

Evidently our education was overrated.

I'm hoping to do bookkeeping for old ladies who can't see -- basic math has to be better than "welcome to wally world." But who knew it would come to this....

[Gabriel]

You write when the mood hits you, and I'll read when the mood hits me, which just so happens to be everytime I see you have a new post!
Keep up the good work, and I hope you had a wonderful birthday!

[Meg]

Comment 100! I have missed you. Think I'll keep coming here again. Life as a blogger brings many benefits (and some costs) but at the end of the day, I miss my community if I don't seek it out.