Lonely is the night

You miss your wife and daughter terribly.

It's late at night. Your apartment feels cavernously empty. The silence seems to echo off the brick walls and reverberate noiselessly. How is that possible? The TV hums in the background. You sigh heavily and, as you gaze upon a photo of your wife and daughter, you pour yourself another scotch.

Things changed so quickly. Only a week ago, you and your family awoke to one of those beautiful spring mornings in Manhattan, the kind of morning that always rekindles your unabated love for this city. Your daughter is practically bursting at the seams with excitement. "Isn't it a beautiful day, guys? When you pick me up today, let's all go to the park for a picnic. Hooray! Picnics!" You and your wife smile and laugh at your daughter's unbridled enthusiasm. Together, all three of you walk out of your apartment building. Rays of golden sunshine warm your faces.

Three hours later, you leave the office briefly to get another dose of that midtown sun. You chat amiably with the Pakistani newstand owner downstairs as the two of you share a cigarette. You both agree that it really is a beautiful day. Despite your yearning to flee from work and enjoy the outdoors, you return upstairs to your office.

Immediately as you walk in, your co-worker runs up to you. "Call your wife. It's an emergency."

In the seconds that it takes for you to dial her number, your mind races. Since your wife is the one calling, you assume that nothing bad has happened to her. What else would constitute an emergency? Has something happened to your daughter? Your heart is racing.

When your wife answers, all you hear are the anguished sounds of her sobbing uncontrollably. Between choking sobs and gulps of air, you hear only isolated words. Father. Liver cancer. Inoperable. Tumor. 8 cm.

Your gut wrenches. A sickening feeling falls into the pit of your stomach. For some strange reason, you're reminded of that tragic morning of 9/11. Another beautiful day that started out with so much promise yet ended with so much pain.

The next 24 hours are a dizzying combination of activity and emotion. Phone calls are made. Tears are shed. Sympathies are laid bare. You learn that everyone reacts differently in these situations.

We all do what we have to in order to get by.

Your wife decides to get on a plane immediately so she can see her ailing father. You agree that it will be easier for everyone if you and your daughter stay at home. You both think you have it all figured out. However, when you telephone your mother-in-law to inform her of the news, she pauses for a moment and then tells you that it's great that your wife is coming to see them. However, the doctor said that her husband needs to enjoy life as much as possible now. Things might get worse soon. That being said, your mother-in-law tells you, do you think the Peanut could come to Texas also? Nothing would make him happier.

You and your wife look at each other and agree wholeheartedly. Knowing how much joy can come from being around a fun-loving toddler, you both know that this is one of the best (and only) things that you can do for her father right now. You also know it's hard to cry when you're laughing so hard. And one thing your daughter does do is provide lots of laughter.

So as you sit alone in your apartment missing your family and thoroughly depressed over your father-in-law's illness, you decide to watch some videos that you took last week. In one, your daughter is demonstrating how if mom and dad will not give her a baby sister, she will make one by herself. And as you sit there with tears in your eyes, you cannot help but start laughing again.

It's true. Laughter really is the best medicine.

I'm having a baby sister from Pierre Kim on Vimeo.

We love you, Dad, and we're thinking about you all the time.

 

Comments

[Lisa K.]

Oh Pierre, I'm so sorry to hear this bad news. This happened to us 4 years ago. My father chose not to go through chemotherapy and the last days of his life were very painful. The only thing that brought him any joy was having his grandkids around. May the Peanut bring BossLady's father as much happiness as possible through this trying ordeal.

[joe]

cool blog waY FUNNY!

[Tina W.]

Oh Pierre :( I'm so so sorry for what your entire family must be going through right now. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Kila]

Hugs and prayers for you all. My condolences.

What would we do without those little two-legged rays of sunshine to cheer us all up? :)

P.S. I sense a baby in your future, next year, 9-12 months from now.

[HL]

We're also so sorry to hear about BL's dad! May family, including your adorable Peanut, help get you all through this difficult time.

[Mom101]

Oh Pierre, I have tears in my eyes too.

Wishing the very best to your wife and the rest of your family. I hope that your father-in-law can always click on that link and see Peanut's amazing smile and energy, even when she's not there with him.

[MetroDude]

So sorry to hear. We wish you guys all the best and a wonderful Mother's Day for the BossLady surrounded by family and love.

[Mitch McDad]

PK,
So sorry to read about your father-in-law. Thoughts and prayers from my family and me.
Mitch

[grace]

just wanted to let you know we are praying for you and your family. . .
-kor/am family in milan, italy

[Stien]

Sorry to hear the bad news, MD. Hope things turn out for the best. We'll pray for you and your family.

[pantrygirl]

Sorry to hear about your FIL.

I will say an extra prayer for you and your family.

[OTRgirl]

I'm sorry.

I know how hard that 'come home' phone call can be. I'm glad that the Peanut is there to bring laughter, funny questions and big hugs to her Grandpa.

It must be hard for you to not be there, too.

[LiteralDan]

I'm so sorry to hear this news. On the positive side, I think a cute kid might just be better than any chemotherapy out there, when properly administered. You'll all be in my thoughts.

[Joleen]

I'm so very sorry to hear about your FIL and I pray that he's able to recover from this. I lost both my parents to cancer and I can only imagine what you're all going through. My prayers are with you.

[tys]

just came back to check...hows your father in law?...really hoping that everything turned out ok...

[the weirdgirl]

Oh Pierre, I am so sorry. I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts.

[stella]

oh good lord. this was heavy. sending good thoughts your way.

i lost my father from cancer 4 years ago..and it just friggin - blows.

ack.

[Holmes]

My prayers for you and yours, my man.

[pepa.malaga]

This is just so sweet!!!! Life is miserable sometimes! I remember when you started your blog... Listen, you definitely has to come to Spain with the peanut and the bosslady! I am sure you'll love it!
Take care!!