Pimp & Primp

We're going to start this post off with a big pimpin' endorsement to Cool Mom Picks.

Why? Many reasons. For one, the site is an amazing resource for moms who are looking for cool, new products to make their lives easier. They focus on non-mainstream products and services, particularly those from indie or emerging designers and mom/women-run companies. Go subscribe to their newsletter here.

Secondly, the two women who run Cool Mom Picks, Liz and Kristen, are not only good friends of mine but they're also cool as hell. 

That's why I found myself last Friday night in an East Village karaoke bar with 25 other awesome mommy bloggers who all happened to be in NYC for the weekend. To celebrate the occasion, the Cool Mom Picks ladies rented out a private karaoke room and asked me to come party with them. How could I resist? 25 mommy bloggers, me, and an open mike? Sign me up!

I should have known how things were going to end up when, within minutes of entering the room, I found myself singing Britney Spears' "Hit Me Baby, One More Time" with Kristen. Several hours and many vodka shots later, LOD and I found ourselves singing a Kenny Loggins duet. Things get a little fuzzy after that but I have a vague recollection of singing Oasis' "Wonderwall" and clearing out the room.

Ladies, if there are any photos or videos of this out there, please burn them immediately. I am the worst kind of karaoke singer. I sound like a dying frog with asthma yet I have absolutely no inhibitions. My apologies to any of you who had to witness this in person. However, big thanks to Liz and Kristen for hosting such a fun evening.

Now, BossLady, Peanut and I are headed off for a little vacation. Since one of my oldest friends is getting married this weekend at this amazing resort on a private island, we've decided to take some extra time to enjoy ourselves.

I plan on spending my daughter's entire college savings in an attempt to set the record for "Most Spa Treatments Done in a Single Week." When the concierge from the resort called me yesterday and read me the full list of spa services, I just said, "Yes." After all, when else am I going to get a Thai Kalapa Volcanic Earth Clay Spa Ritual? Or a Milk and Honey Body Wrap? Shit, I think the only treatments I turned down were the prenatal massage and the margarita pedicure.

Lest you worry that I not be engaged in more masculine pursuits, I'll have you know that I'll be singlehandedly carrying two enormous pieces of luggage, a stroller, golf clubs, four tennis rackets, thirty-five Disney DVDs, twenty Dr.Seuss books, two stuffed animals, and a hyperactive toddler who thinks I'm her personal horsey. By the time the plane lands, I fully expect to have a pulled groin or a herniated disk. Hell, maybe I will get that prenatal massage.

Anyway, since those damn spa sessions never begin on time and since I expect to have a few free moments between cocktails, I thought this would be a good time for a MetroDad Mailbag. We haven't done one in a long time.

So go ahead. Ask me anything you want. Leave the questions in the comments or shoot me an e-mail. As always, we'll cover anything from the personal to the inane. As always, the weirder, the better.

By the way, quick question for all my male readers out there: Does the Bacon Bra make you hungry or horny? I'm asking for purely scientific purposes, of course.

Comments

[Angie in Texas]

OOOO yeah! #1 Baby!

Bacon is proof there is a god.

Jealous . . . have a great trip!

[Bradley]

Who was the hottest TV mom? I read on ESPN that Bill Simmons voted for Elyse Keaton. Who would you vote for?

[Jo]

As a vegetarian woman.. the bacon bra makes me a little ill... it looks like peeled lady!

What can I ask ... I've taught English to some really lovely Korean girls.

Have you been there much? How connected to Korea do you feel, as opposed to being an Asian American. How are the two identities connected, or are they the same?

I live in Ireland, where only in the last ten or so years so we have people from other countries living here, up til then it was 95% white Irish Catholics.
So we as a country have very little experience of the concept of other cultures becoming Irish, as it were.

[Mama Nabi]

I know, I know... you asked your male readers. But I have to confess... I'm CRAVING some bacon right now.
My mom does this operatic rendition of Patti Page's "Changing Partners" at every karaoke opportunity and has rendered me permanently traumatized. Hence I was not able to watch ALL those video clips floating around. :-) Just kidding - I only found one floating around.
Tennis, anyone? Have a great vacation! And spa visits. What, not taking a car seat along for the trip as well?

[Sean]

That bacon was raw, so I'm going to have to pass on hungry.

[BossLady]

MD. I just have one question: Who do you suppose will be with Peanut while you get pampered like a lap dog?

[Krista]

My question is this: How old is MetroDog?

[Karen]

Amazing resort? Private island? Is it PSV in the Grenadines? If not, try it.

[Byrd Man]

Do you think your Mets will even make the playoffs this year? Especially the way they looked against my Phillies today?

[Backpacking Dad]

Um. Horny.

But I don't feel good about it.

Question: Bobby Flay or Mario Batali? That's it. Just pick one. You can set other parameters if you wish (best to drink with, more feared in an alligator wrassle...)

[nzer]

im not a guy but the sound of a bacon bra sounds disgusting, if it were raw itd be slimy and smell gross and if it were cooked it would be greasy and gross. ok a question, how do you know so many famous people\how do your friends know so many famous people?

[Rachel E.]

What would your ideal profession be? Are you doing it now? If not, why not?

BTW, bacon bra? SO. DAMN. FUNNY!

[helen]

Question MD: Would you consider a partner for MetroDog in near future?

[Derek]

I have to go to a karaoke party in a few weeks and I'm nervous as hell. I've never sang in front of other people before. What are your top 5 karaoke songs?

[Sassy]

You cannot be worse than this chick -

http://circushour.com/2008/04/08/i-ken-lee/

[Lane]

This one is personal:
You own a Frenchie--can we hear a few funny stories about your dog (he/she's a Frenchie there HAVE to be some funny stories there!) and maybe see some pictures?!!

[JDG]

Do you and Bosslady have free passes for any given celebrity? For example, if my wife is out one night and she sees Clive Owen, she is officially allowed to cheat on me with him. Likewise if I happen to run into Jessica Alba. Who would you and Bosslady choose?

[Mary]

Are you and Bosslady only planning to have one child? I have an almost 1.5 year old boy and the hubby wants another kid but I'm not so sure...

[Sam]

Dude, I know they're your friends. But come on!
I love your blog for its crisp writing and sensible perspective on parenthood.
But are you seriously recommending a site hawking $338 diaper bags and $28 T-shirts? Yes, I've read the blog's claims that it promotes "quality items not made by 6 year olds in sweatshops."
Like you, I’m a live-and-let-live kind of guy. I have nothing against boutique shops that sell expensive stuff to parents who can afford them. But I get a bit nauseous when it's done with the self-righteous tone of "responsible consumerism."
As owner of an apparel company that may or may not be involved in international trade, you should have been more skeptical about such claims from the bloggers who think they know what's good for you.
Personally, I also tend to question the credibility of bloggers who openly and repeatedly hawk for free shit without returning them.

[ThisGuy]

The answer to your question is yes.

Note, though, that cooking that bacon should be done wearing an apron. Having done it "al fresco," I can tell you that there are spots where you don't want bacon spatters.

[nanamjaya1]

Bacon Bra - Makes me feel...., mmmm...., greasy.

[Mike]

If it would have been cooked, but, mushy, not crispy, it would have been both. Otherwise I can't get behind covering oneself with raw meat. It's a waste of perfectly good bacon if it wasn't cooked up.

Oh yeah, I think Cool Mom Picks is good too. Do they wear bacon bras too?

[Jay]

Hm.

I think you might just be a cool guy, disney dvds and all. :)

[jay]

I loves me some bacon (have you seen the bacon flowchart?!) and was expecting hungry, horny, or both, but that... er, um... sorry. yuk.

[Whit]

Re: Bacon Bra, I was going to answer 'both' until I saw the picture. Now I'll go with 'neither.'

My question for you is: Can I come with you? I'll take the margarita pedicure. I'm not proud.