There Can Be Only One!

As I've mentioned here before, during the first year of the Peanut's life, I was The Man! 

To my lovely little daughter, I was the living embodiment of Christmas, Elmo, and an all-you-can-eat ice cream buffet.

When she woke up in the morning, she demanded that I be the one who got her out of the crib, changed her diaper, and dressed her.  When she hurt her knee at the playground, it was me that she always came running to.  When she was hungry, only I was allowed to prepare her dinner and feed her.  And every moment of every day, all she ever wanted to do was hang out with me.

But back then, it was easy to win her affections.  I was the funny guy who would stuff baby carrots up his nose just to keep her entertained.  I was the one who would make yarmulkes and beards out of the bubbles in her bathtub.  And I was the one who would run around the apartment with my boxers on my head just to hear her giggle. 

But after her first year, I dropped in the standings.  BossLady was #1, the nanny was #2, and I was a distant third.  When we switched the Peanut to daycare, I thought I'd move up to the #2 spot but I was quickly displaced by one of the Peanut's teachers.  Damn!

Now, although I have a vicious competitive streak, I would never try and compete with the BossLady for my daughter's affections.  As l've said before, if parenthood has taught me anything, it's that everything I do is for the benefit of my daughter.  So, once again, I realized that I needed to change my perspective and alter my way of thinking.  I couldn't allow my competitive spirit to manifest itself. To paraphrase Mikhail Baryshnikov, "I do not try to parent better than anyone else. I only try to parent better than myself."

So, if the Peanut loved BossLady more than she did me, so be it.  C'est la vie.  I wasn't going to try and compete for her affections and I was just going to have to learn to accept that, in her own little way, the Peanut loved me too. Mature, eh?

Well, internet, I'm proud to say today that...I'M NUMBER ONE!  WOO HOO!  THAT'S RIGHT, AMIGOS!  NUMERO UNO!  WHO ROCKS THE PARTY?  I ROCK THE PARTY! NUMBER TWO IN YOUR PROGRAM, NUMBER ONE IN YOUR HEART!  I'M THE MOTHERFLIPPPING RHYMENOCEROUS!  HEY!  HO!

Ok, so I admit it...

A part of me had a hard time dealing with the fact that the Peanut loved BossLady more than me.  It wasn't that my little girl didn't shower me with affection.  It's just that whenever the BossLady showed up, the Peanut would go bonkers!  I felt like one of those stay-at-home-moms who deals with unruly toddlers all day, only to see them turn into little angels when daddy walked in the door from work. 

Heck, after all, I'm the one who prepares all of the Peanut's meals.  I'm the one who takes her to the playground every day, brings her on bike rides around the city, drives her out to Coney Island for the amusement rides, and takes her to the water park all the time.  Why shouldn't I be #1?

Anyway, I know my time as #1 is probably short-lived but I thought it would be fun for the Peanut and I to celebrate my newfound status over a few ghetto dogs this afternoon. 

Jacket and tie optional.

Meanwhile, I just caught the end of a funny commercial promoting some new sitcom.  In it, the father leans over to his son and says, "You know how they say parents love all their kids the same?  Well, you're in third place.  Better step it up!"

For some reason, I thought that line was hilarious. Do any of you pull that stuff with your kids?  And do you find yourself competing with you spouse over your kids' affections?  Consciously or sub-consciously?  And what about you childless folks?  Surely, you have a favorite niece or nephew, right? 

An inquiring mind wants to know...

Comments

[Justine]

In our house, my daughter's #1 is her older sister. She absolutely adores her and will follow her around like a little puppy. I think I'm a distant #2. Not even sure Hubs is in the top 5.

[sexinthecity]

I'm so in love with the Peanut, MD! Every time you put up a picture of her, my utuerus starts screaming. I guess that's nature's way of telling me I should settle down and get married.

[Oh Baby Gifts]

adorable story. In our family even the dogs get their ranks lol.

[ChristieNY]

Cute! Just wait until you guys venture into parenthood a second time - woah boy - family dynamics will shift all over the place!

My guess is Peanut will latch on to you while BossLady tends baby2. It's a win-win.

Hope you enjoyed you ghetto dogs! ;)

[spygirl]

right or wrong, my dad is always straightforward and honest with us. Always. So he's also told us that its just a known (secret) truth that parents love their kids differently - its never the same.

I just grew up feeling that its just an accepted truth that he loves my younger sister most (will always be his baby), and loves my older sister in a different way, as the mature leader and future caretaker of the family. Ppl are shocked that my dad would tell me this, but I don't feel that its bad to know.

[enygma]

I think my siblings and I prefer our dad over our mom, but that's because she can be crazy in the way that only Korean women can. My dad is more calm and rarely got mad at us. At the same time, I get the impression that my parents prefer my siblings over me. C'est la vie, I suppose.

[Susannah]

I love your paraphrase of Mikhail Baryshnikov, "I do not try to parent better than anyone else. I only try to parent better than myself."

Something all those competimommies and drive-by parents should take to heart.

[Cat]

My favorite...the one that is causing me the least amount of trouble at that particular moment. Usually my boy, he's still sweet and smiley at 2, not like his uptight, incharge sister at 4.

[Jeff S.]

Growing up, I was definitely my parents' least favorite kid. I was the one always getting in trouble, dropping out of school, and making them worry. Somehow, 25 years later, I'm their favorite. Why? Because I'm the only one who gave them grandchildren! Ironic, isn't it?

[Sarah]

I think I'm number 1 with both of my kids. but I'm a SAHM and so I spend a lot of time talking up their father and grandmother to them. Don't you want Papa to put you to bed? Can't Grandma kiss that boo-boo? After 8+ hours of all me, I am so ready to drop down the list.

[landismom]

I think I'm #1 with my daughter and #2 with my son (perhaps the fact that he always calls me "daddy" has something to do with my impression). And though I'd never admit this to them--I like hanging out with her more. She can be a pain, but she's super-bright, and we get to have great philosophical conversations. Her 4-years-younger brother just can't compete.

[Sal]

For awhile I was # 1 with my oldest daughter, and always felt little sorry for my wife. Now that things have switched I enjoy the "time off", but I'm also little worried if I ever will be up there in her affections. For now if Mommy asks her "...and do you love Daddy too?", she emphatically says "NO". Go figure!

[Alan]

Don't worry, MD. I'm #5 in my daughter's heart following mommy, grandma, the nanny, and auntie sue. I guess she's a girl's girl.

[momomax]

both me and my husband get bumped from the top spot by a certain golden lab whenever my son gets to see him.

I'm #1 when the kid is sick or tired, and my husband gets devotion when the kid wants to laugh...dubious winnings for me but I'll take it.

[Scarlett]

Whenever us kids (all grown but not married) tease my dad he tells us we are "No longer the favorite" and if we are all together, he plays us against each other.

It's really just a big joke in my family.

My dad is always quick to tell people that we take after him if we are complimented in any way. My mom just shakes her head. She knows his deal.

[bridget]

motha flippin...it's business time . you gotta have an emergency band meeting about who's #1!

[Emily]

I'm the youngest of four. Whenever I joke that my dad loves me best and says he has the known the otheres longer so naturally he likes them more.

[Jv]

Personally, I think I'm #1 to our son, Parker, but, I'm sure it changes according to the day and whoever has given themselves more to him. We never gloat about it...its just sorta "known"...and there are times when I wish I weren't #1, like when Parker yells from the bathroom: "Mom, come wipe my butt!". Uhg!

Jv

http://parkerspost.blogspot.com

[Bicycle Apparel]

Well now, I was searching for blogs on fitness or health when i came across this post. Although not exactly what I was expecting I will give it ****.