Fashionistas Are Born, Not Made!

The Doctor and I have been speaking to each other on the phone almost every day for the past 25 years.  We used to joke that nothing in our lives really happened until the other person heard about it.

Today, for example, the Doctor told me an awesome story about performing surgery on a 275 pound Irish construction worker who spends his free time fighting illegally in Brooklyn basements (a la "Fight Club.")  The guy just had his finger reattached three weeks ago after someone literally BROKE IT OFF in a fight. 

During the course of his procedure, this guy regaled the Doctor with stories about his years training in jujitsu, the time he bit off someone's nose, and how much money he makes for each fight ($2,000 if he wins.) 

The Doctor and I were amazed!  We talked about what total pussies we were and how if we ever found ourselves forced to fight in a Brooklyn basement, we'd probably crap all over our Hugo Boss boxer shorts.  These "Fight Club" guys probably knew 100 ways to kill us just by LOOKING in our general direction! 

The Doctor and I are not tough.  We kill with sarcasm and our favorite weapon is a loofah.  In fact, while talking about underground brawls and the movie "Fight Club," we ended up getting completely sidetracked into a 20-minute debate about whether Brad Pitt's clothes in the film were designed by John Varvatos, Alexander McQueen, or John Galliano. 

You see, my friends, I have a confession to make...

Before the Peanut arrived into our lives and rendered the concept of disposable income completely laughable, I was somewhat of a clothes horse. 

Don't get me wrong.  It's not like I used to gussy myself up in sartorial splendor.  It's more that I have always adamantly refused to wear the requisite clothing that has somehow been deemed societally appropriate for men of my age (khakis, button-down oxfords, loafers, sweatshirts, polar fleece pullovers, navy blazers---I am congenitally allergic to all of those things.) 

What would you expect from a man whose mother dressed him in leopard-print bathing suits when he was a boy? 

For the most part, I usually wear the same thing every day---dark jeans, dark shirt, black urban boots.  Really, if you ever saw me, you would never imagine that I was the kind of guy who spent more than a few minutes thinking about his daily wardrobe (that insouciant style requires a lot of work, people!)

My lovely daughter, the Peanut, being two years old, seems to have inherited my interest in fashion.  These days, she's particularly obsessed with her socks.  If I don't put the right socks on her feet, she will go into complete meltdown mode.  She's also quite fond of creating her own outfits. 

A few months ago, we bought the Peanut two items: a pair of jeans and a miniature Hello Kitty umbrella.  She loves the jeans immensely because the pockets are deep enough that she can put both hands in them and jump up and down like a jackhammer. And naturally, she likes the umbrella because it is pink, cute and makes her feel like a big girl. 

I tell you all of this because, last weekend, the BossLady and I were hanging out in the living room.  Things were abnormally quiet in the Peanutsphere and we were starting to get concerned.  Just as we were about to check up on her, she came prancing into the room topless, wearing only her jeans, swinging her little umbrella, and singing "Old McDonald."   

I almost peed my pants laughing, it was so funny.  It was like a gay stage production of  "M. Butterfly" meets "Singin' in the Rain."

Today, we didn't feel like butting heads with the Peanut over her wardrobe choices so we let her wear whatever she wanted.  Being a fan of mixing and matching disparate styles to create her own look, the Peanut apparently decided that nothing says lazy Sunday like a snowboard hat, an art smock and a Hello Kitty handbag. 

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the latest outfit from the Peanut Kim 2006 Holiday Collection...

Fashion...it changes so quickly these days.  Who can keep up? 

Comments

[landismom]

Wow. That is a rockin' outfit. Project Runway 2026, here we come!

[leora]

She's a little princess. She's a little punk. Love the outfit!

too cute. I love it. everything had to match when my daughter was younger... and had to be either pink or purple.

[Karen Rani]

Ha. The first part of your entry, I was thinking about what a pussy I am too - but I'm a girl, so somehow it's okay for me to be a, uh, pussy. No pun intended though - I seriously am one. Really.

[Nothing But Bonfires]

I would totally order the snowboarding hat from the Peanut Kim 2006 Holiday Collection. Perhaps even the art smock, to be paired with thick tights and boots.

I love how she's even got the model pout down.

[prescott]

OK, even as a male who lives in a major city and applies Dermalogica moisturizer daily, I have to ask -- what the fuck are "urban boots"?!

[KG]

That's so funny about Peanut and the socks. Our Pumpkin can melt down — depending on his tiredness — if he has his "school socks" on at night and "sleepy socks" on during the day. (Yes, I do a LOT of sock laundry around here.) Then there are the "day clothes" (for running in parks, etc.) and the "night clothes" (pajamas!), and never the twain shall meet. Once I tried to put on a "day shirt" that closely resembled pajamas, in my opinion, as a pajama top. Then I was on the receiving end of a 2-year-old fashionista riot act: "Day clothes are for DAY TIME!!!!!! Waaaaah!"

Karen Rani — you got a point there about the female fight clubs. There don't seem to be any, do there? Not that I'm interested in joining one. I don't want any of my fingers ripped off!

[Sue]

I almost didn't get past the part where the guy bit off someone's nose. Somewhere in this world there is a person walking around noseless. That's so sad! Be proud to be a pussy! You meet other men and you let them keep their noses!

And ah, your little supermodel in the making. She is even perfecting that supermodel expression of profound depressive angst when she poses in her post-post modern toddler wear. (And I do prefer toddler wear on toddlers.)

[Lisa C. Marks]

We have a little fashionista also who insists on wearing her bright orange raincoat every single day (yes, even when it's not raining.) She also insists on wearing polka dot leggings and slippers all the time. She's got quite a look going. I think she's the next Betsey Johnson!

[Christopher]

As I sit here in my fleece pullover and khakis, I can say I like her outfit a lot. But I really like what her friend is wearing: the pink fading to blue? the concentric circles? Very cool.

[jamie's mommy]

"We kill with sarcasm and our favorite weapon is a loofah."

I love hearing about you and the doctor. You two crack me up!

[kittenpie]

I love it. She's even sucking in the cheeks for max cheekbone effect and the perfect disdainful expression!

We have some sock issues around here, too. Not only must there be socks if the pajamas are not footed, but the socks must be of the prescribed colour for any outift, up to and including the aforementioned pajamas. Jinkies!

[helen]

Peanut is too cute! She looks like she's doing Zoolander's "blue steel"!

[creative-type dad]

Wow- that's some fashion taste there.

BTW- "spends his free time fighting illegally in Brooklyn basements"
What a relief - I thought I was the only one...

[eliaday]

My two-year old is going through a phase where the only thing she wears is brown. Brown pants, brown shirts, brown jacket. For the past MONTH.

I can't decide whether it's a fashion statement or an anti-fashion statement or an endorsement for a good washer/dryer combo.

[L.]

My husband is a fashionista -- he buys all of the kids` clothing. In the early yaers, he complained so much about the (perfectly acceptable) clothes I bought that I said, "Fine! Next time YOU buy them!" and for 10 years, he has.

I didn`t even know Diesel MADE kids clothes....

[IFLYG]

I can't believe that the guy regaled The Doctor with those stories. The first rule in fight club is: you don't talk about fight club. I oughta kick his ass...
BTW - too cute.

[Janet a.k.a Wonder Mom]

She's highly diverse in her haute couture fashion. She knows what she wants and she knows how to get it.

She's tougher (and way cooler) than that dude in fight club if you ask me.

[William]

The princess/Punk look is somewhat Ironic in that teeanager trying to be ironic type of way. And She is only two. Wow.

[Waya]

You can definitely be my stylist any day Pierre! I wonder if you tell your wife what looks good or not in style? Or knowing her from your blog, she'll probably tells you to go you-know-what to yourself!

And the Peanut is definitely "making it work" as in Tim Gunn's words.

[Jennifer]

What is it with toddlers and socks? My son refuses to allow me to put anything on his feet. Every morning, he has a meltdown when it's time to put on his socks. They outgrow this, right? PLEASE TELL ME THEY OUTGROW IT!

[Kristen]

And don't try and mess with them when they do this... you know that right?

All toddler hell will break loose...

Sort of like a drunk, high Isaac Mizrahi with a pair of scissors (read; NOT PRETTY)

[panthergirl]

I love this post on so many levels... not the least of which is seeing you in your leopard trunks.

But the reason I love it the MOST is because the Peanut reminds me so much of my own Peanut, Emma.

Emma always wore mis-matched socks. And mismatched clothes in general. Stripes and plaids, polka dots and pinstripes. Of course, prior to turning 5, these clothes were usually only kept on for a few minutes anyway since she was the ultimate streaker...even down the streets of Park Slope.

But I digress. One morning, after she had gussied herself up in a manner befitting Minnie Pearl, I suggested that her choices were less than, er, pretty. She huffed at me and said "Well, YOU don't have to wear it!"

End of conversation. I'm convinced that it was over clothing choices that the term "pick your battles" was coined.

[Jonathon]

She has a gift, dude.

And PS: khakis and loafers are not required at any age. Never succomb, dude. Never succomb.

[Jonathon]

Apologies for using "dude" like it's my tourette's tick in that last comment.

Apologies for the mulitple comments.

[Ian]

My best mate and I have been known to spend a whole day shopping for clothes together while our wives go out for a run. We're not so tough either. Truly love the Peanut's sense of fashion.

[Martha]

Wait until the teenage years, MD! I swear that I get into a fight with my daughter almost once a week over some crazy outfit that she put together.

[KC]

Your peanut is truly bubbalicious.

That hat rocks.

I'm trying to convince my daughter that mommy's underwear around the neck is so last year.

[john]

I have 3 different fashionistas in my house.
Oldest daugther. 2nd Grade--wears snow pants and a snowman sweater to school every day. Was an awful shock to her when we told her she couldnt wear her jean overalls to a black tie wedding.

Middle daugther.First grade. puts together odd items in eclectic combinations complete with berets and hats.

Youngest daughter. 2 going on 7. Wears striped dresses with striped tights every day going out. When she gets home she changes out everything and puts on her blue pajamas.

Good luck. It only gets worse.

[nonlineargirl]

I hear that the princess print is the new black.

[Leeny]

Get her one of those buttons to pin on her clothes that says, "I dressed myself". Really. ;)

[Kristen]

Hilarious. The Peanut rocks that look - seriously! And now we know she comes by it naturally. Woooo!!

[Eliza]

I think watching kids put their own outfits together is the cutest thing. My little niece loves to dress herself. Right now, her favorite outfit is her pajama shirt, denim overalls, blue Dora slippers, and pink scarf. I think she's been wearing this every day for a straight week. We're having a hard time not laughing at her.

[Melissa]

She looks like she's ready to take on the world if you ask me. I love the whole look, but I'd kill for the hat. ;)

[Emily]

The peanut looks fantastic, and FYI loafers are never appropriate.

[honglien123]

That is a very cool outfit the peanut has on. She's totally matching with the pink sleeves, hat, and bag. Alas, I'm pretty much a pussy (as someone else said, I'm a woman so it's ok), I wilt in the court of public opinion. My kids are hardly ever allowed to go in public with something they choose on their own. (At least you're brave that way.) Although, you can always tell when their daddy dressed them. He's the guy dressed like every 25 year old guy out there, cargo pants and polo with every gadget imaginable in those pockets.

[Lucy S.]

The pink camo snowboard hat totally makes the outfit. I love it. Rock on, Peanut!

[Henri]

Damn I wore the same thing today. Thank God you guys live on the other coast or I would have died of embarrassment. Oh wait my briefcase is black. Ooops still, it would have been pretty close.

[enygma]

I can't even tell that's a smock. Peanut is too cool. I admit this freely: she has a better sense of fashion than I do. The first thing I do when I come home from work is to take off all my clothes and climb into my adidas warm ups and a t-shirt or my pajamas, depending on how late it is.

[Tessa]

And where might one purchase items from the Parker Kim Holiday Collection? That outfit is simply tooo cute!

[misfithausfrau]

The get-ups will only get better. My daughter's current favorite is to wear two and three dresses at the same time. It's really great to go out in public and watch people do double and triple takes. Rock on Peanut!

[AdventureDad]

Cute photo! My son loves to take OFF his socks for some reason. That might explain why we have around one million unmatched socks at home. Where the hell do they all go?

AD

[serena]

delurking to say that i can't believe how big the peanut has gotten. i remember discovering your blog when she was first born. doesn't seem that long ago!

[Karl S.]

Wow! What a cutie! BTW, nothing wrong with sticking to jeans, a shirt and boots. There is a seasoned maturity and elegance (not to mention the damn simplicity) of only choosing to dress in one outfit. I'm thinking, Steve Jobs jeans and black turtlenecks. The dude has it right. Who has the time to think about what to wear.

[momto3cubs]

Love her hat!

My oldest boy (9) doesn't care at all what he's wearing. My middle son (7) is very picky about his clothes and he often puts together the greatest outfits--a true cool, tough guy look. My youngest (4) is still in that toddler/preschool stage of dressing up in hilarious non-matching outfits. Fortunately he DOES let me dress him in the morning before school--I know I'm very lucky there!

Nothing pink here, so I get a kick out of Peanut's outfits!

[ray lee]

i really wanna join one of these "fight clubs." hitting and getting hit are really exciting. except... i can't come into work like that every week.

also, you named a lot of things, but where do nice suits come in? if i had to choose, i'd wear a suit and tie everyday... especially if it's tailored. i don't own even 1 pair of jeans because sweats are a zillion times more comfortable!

and your daughter is jus awesome. i wonder how my daughters/sons will turn out...

-ray leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[Kristin]

My husband has worn some version of khaki and Reyn Spooner shirts since I met him one million years ago...

My daughter is currently wearing a shirt that says, "Everyone Loves A Blue Eyed Girl" (she's Chinese) and a pair of Roxy leggings that Lindsey Lohan would covet and 14 Princess Barbie band-aids...

I think we should hook the girls up and market them to Target.

[metro mama]

That Peanut, she's so au courant.

[RJ's Mama]

After looking at the Peanut's outfit, why do I get the feeling that she's going to be a future rock star? She's so punk, it hurts! Rock on, Peanut!

[Queen of Ass]

Yet, she is quite stunning, isn't she?