Before the Peanut was born, I sat up here very haughtily on my high horse and silently castigated the parents that I would see on the streets. From my golden perch made of moral rectitude, I would point out all their many flaws and declare them as examples of the kind of parent that I would never become. Silently, I would witness their behavior and cast judgment on their erroneous actions.
I think you know I'm kidding. I think you also know that I'm hardly one to be judgmental. I've always thought people were better off minding their own business. Unfortunately, it's sad how rarely this occurs. Especially when it comes to parenting, I've always believed that there are many "correct" ways to raise a child. And if we're to believe that our children will become the sum total of their experiences, than I tend to also think we're not going to fuck them up too bad with our individual and multi-varied approaches.
But I will admit that one thing that always got me semi-riled up was seeing kids with leashes on them. Now don't get me wrong. You want to put handcuffs on your girlfriend or a dog collar on your husband, you go right ahead. This is America, people. Land of the free and home of the brave. But leashes on kids? Man, I always thought that was unduly obdurate behavior. The entire concept just seems so Abu Ghraib-ish.
Don't get me wrong. I can see the chain of events and dialectic reasoning that could lead one to believe that it's perfectly logical and acceptable to leash ones kid. You see, my little 9-month old daughter, the Peanut, has proved to be an amazingly fast crawler. Extraordinary, considering the fact that she just learned how to crawl a few weeks ago. Now? Not only can she crawl but she can stand herself up and, with the help of furniture, can walk around the living room. We're only slightly exaggerating when we say that we're terrified that she's going to be able to walk by herself within the next few weeks. But my point is that, right now, she's like a little kitten on steroids. Turn your back for a second...and she's gone! The adjustment has been tough for me and the BossLady.
A few days ago, the Peanut was by my side as I was washing some of her bottles in the sink. I look up a second later, only to see her putting dog food in her mouth and splashing the water from our dog's water bowl.
Yesterday, I put her on the floor to go get her bib. I think I turned my back on her for literally 10 seconds. Next thing I know, she's crawled about 20 feet over to the living room and pulled down a stack of DVDs.
So yeah. On the one hand, I could probably child-proof my entire existence. Or, on the other hand, I could just put a leash on her. But I'm afraid that this type of reasoning could lead too far. What's next? Crate-training? Electronic collars? Halters? Exercise pens? Muzzles? Choker chains?
We live in a dangerous world, my friends. Kids run into traffic, get abducted or fall down wells every day. So I understand and empathize with any parent's concerns in regard to his/her child's safety. If anything, ensuring our child's safety and well-being should be any parent's paramount concern. But, in MY opinion, leashing my kid just doesn't feel right. It feels cruel and barbaric. And I don't like the implications of it. So for now, if I need to employ extreme diligence and concentration in order to keep a constant eye on my daughter, that's what I'm going to do.
But, having been a father for only 9 months, I have yet to experience the stress of chasing after a 4-year old Tasmanian devil. So who knows? In a few years, it wouldn't be beyond the realm of my imagination to see me at Prada, inquiring whether they make child leashes in black suede. As always, when it comes to parenting, I reserve the right to change my mind at any given moment.
But I'm curious, internet. What do you think? Am I being naive in thinking that leashing a kid is somewhat bizarre behavior? Will I change my mind in a few years? Do you leash your kids? How do the kids feel about them? Does the dog get confused? Let's hear it, folks. We haven't had a good old-fashioned, hash-it-out melee since that whole spanking debate. Let's bring it on.
Really how cares what people say or think about the leash.All i know is its a safety thing for me and it works!!! You can talk all you want and say oh there just lazy parents.NO THERE JUST SMART PARENTS that are NOT GOING take any chances!!!With this world today you never know!!I rather be safe then sorry..Really its time to get over it!!
Posted by: keeley | February 11, 2008 at 01:56 PM
Wow. The leash subject is always interesting. In my opinion almost all people say "I am never going to leash my kids." But then reality can kick in. As a mother of three it has for me. I swore up and down I would never use one, until my 3 year started to run out in front of a truck. People make comments about how parents should have control of their children and shouldn't need a leash. To me, it seems like it is a hard situation when you have a toddler in the cart and a 3 year old running off... how easy is it to catch that 3 year old while pushing a cart in which your toddler is somehow mananging to get out of the belt?!?!?! Do you get what I am saying here? Sometimes it comes down to doing what you have to do for your child's safety. No matter what anyone thinks!! Now as far as just using a leash in your home or something, I wouldn't do that. I will use one at the store, mall, or maybe going for a walk. When you are somewhere that the child running away is dangerous. And I tell you, I haven't used one on my toddler yet, but I bet that my toddler would love being able to walk, even with a leash verus sitting in a buggy. Now, as far as the type of leash..I think the monkey backpack is very cute and not that terrible looking. I don't like the wrist ones myself and don't use those. I think that if the kid tried to run off with one on it would hurt on their wrist vs their back. In the end, I do agree that all children are different. And I have the ones that run off and grab whatever they can off the shelves. If I can save my childs life by putting on a leash then I will do so. And I am not going to worry about what anyone thinks.
Posted by: lvnmomy | April 23, 2008 at 11:51 AM
I have always thought those leashes were absolutely ridiculous until my husband just asked me if we wanted to take the kids to cedar point.
My two year old is well behaved but very energetic, independent, strong willed, and active. I'm considering getting one for HIS SAFETY has a back up plan while we're at the amusement park. He doesn't like to be restrained all the time, and he is big and strong enough to walk quite a bit, but the thought of him slipping out of my hands makes me sick to my stomach.
I also have a 1 year old and we use a double stroller. I have done many things with the both of them and am able to keep good control of them both. One trick I use is putting the baby in the bannana stroller and having the toddler "push" so he feels independent but is still attached right to me. But the thought of all day at an amusement park is scary.
I think the stares and gawks would be worth having the insurance plan.
Posted by: Sarah | May 28, 2008 at 02:06 PM
There is nothing "absent-minded" about most parents and calling every parent who has trouble keeping up with their child is not only absurd, but just plain stupid. Sometimes there is a time when kids can get beyond your control. I spent quite some time working in a daycare with 1 to 2 year olds in a class of 15 and believe me, that is a lesson in how fast these kids can scatter (most often at diaper time). I completely agree with leashing when children are still learning the meaning of "no" and what danger is. Reasoning with a child who have not developed that ability is a exercise in futility. Once children are able to reason, know where danger is, and obey their parents without hours long "why?" sessions, a leash shouldn't be necessary. But if it is, it is.
Honestly, I'd like to know how many of the people who are so opposed to leashes wheeled their children around in veritable cages they called strollers strapped in to within an inch of their lives? Leashes provide a sense of freedom while still imposing limits on children who need them. I honestly think that leashing at home is wrong, but in public where anything can happen, it pays to be prepared. At this very moment I'm looking for one for my sister in law who can no longer carry her 2 year old because she's 7 months pregnant and you wonder if he's got bricks in his diaper when you pick him up. Plus my mother had wrist leashes for my brother and myself (we're 15 months apart) and I didn't suffer from it. Seriously people, grow up until your children do.
Posted by: strap'emup | June 17, 2008 at 09:42 PM
I am very pro-leash myself.
Posted by: Hungrydog | September 11, 2008 at 04:20 PM
We saw several in the airport on our recent trip to Vegas with my son and his fiance. The cutest was a pair of twins.
After that my son has decided to get one for my hubby, who can't sit still and wanders off incessantly. He didn't see the humor in it like we did.
Posted by: AnnieR | November 14, 2008 at 11:45 AM
This is OLD but cracking my shit up. I'd love to see a side by side of this post and one on when a kid becomes smarter than a dog. Cause seriously? We walk our dog and our kid every night after work and the kid pitches a tiz if we don't let her wear one of the dog's extra collars around her waist (she prefers the reflective one)AND a leash. Try to unhook the leash when she's not looking -- she'll happily blow every eardrum within 2 yards. Maybe we should sit her 21 month old tail down and explain how embarrasing it is. Or we could just keep laughing our asses off and taking pictures.
Posted by: Jojo | June 25, 2009 at 09:53 AM
Hi Kenny thanks for these new ideas. My 12-year-old Aussie, Rocky, and I love Halibut Point State Park in any wehetar. Gorgeous views of the quarry and Ipswich Bay, great walking paths that are easy on canine feet, and it's only ever crowded on summer weekends. Fall and spring we love Good Harbor Beach for the social element lots of other dogs to meet and run with!
Posted by: Yuji | July 04, 2012 at 04:18 PM
Hi Erin I saw your stuff today at Countryside and started with the punaet butter treats. Sophie is nuts for them so I wondered if I can make them with your mix they sell? Also, Sophie is a 16 pound Jack Russell Shi Tzu mix, what size harness do you think would be best for her? I love the one with the lady bug! Thanks! Heather
Posted by: Himanshu | July 04, 2012 at 09:33 PM
For starters get a heranss that doesn't choke. I use both an Easy Walker and a collar, and attach the leash to both D-rings. That prevents neck injuries. Refuse to pull or be pulled, absolutely, all the time, no exceptions. Turn around and go the other way, or stop and become a tree. The instant the leash is loose, mark the glorious event with a click or attaboy, and follow up with a treat dropped BY YOUR SIDE. This video shows how: /watch?v=sFgtqgiAKoQ
Posted by: Marco | July 04, 2012 at 09:39 PM
Dear Doc, strange as this may seem -reading your blogs has bemoce part of my morning ritual--I never know what I'm going to learn--but learn I do. George and I have lived in our house for 29 years...our ecosystem runs deep. Have a good (bike riders read safe) day.
Posted by: Carlos | July 04, 2012 at 11:16 PM
oh my god, you are amazing, amnsuig, a gem, a rarity. i read what you say and i am marvelled at your oddity. i read, from my home, from a distance. if i ever actually had to deal with you, i would punch you and get you out of my way so INSTANTLY.yepppppppp. i'm a woman.
Posted by: Sastu | July 06, 2012 at 07:01 AM