I can't believe it's been three weeks since I've last posted an entry. Apologies all around! Drinks are on the house tonight! Free donuts for everyone!
In all seriousness, I truly appreciate the concern that people have shown regarding my brief hiatus from the world of blogging. I'm not going to bore you with all the details. But about 2 weeks ago, I was hit with a bad case of the flu. When I wasn't curled up in a feverish sweat, I was suffering from a bad case of the chills. The whole ordeal was pure misery. Unfortunately, my physician advised me that there was nothing I could really do except wait it out and rest. He recommended that I take Advil to reduce my fever. Now, the directions on the Advil bottle suggest a dosage not to exceed 6 capsules in a 24-hour period. But the armchair logician in me hypothesizes that if 6 capsules are good, then 12 capsules must be even better. How's that for deductive reasoning? Anyway, the end result in ingesting all that Advil was that I ended up with some internal stomach bleeding. Basically, I got a fucking ulcer. Man, I know I'm almost 37 years old but I can't believe that I've already had my first ulcer. What's next? Gout? Kidney stones? Arthritis? Are the wheels starting to fall off already?
If you've ever had an ulcer, you know the burning abdominal pain that comes with it. I think the closest analogy would be if someone were to stick a dull and rusty knife into your stomach. Pleasant image, eh? Anyway, the pain and nausea are starting to subside and I'm slowly starting to feel like a productive member of the human race again. And as a vainly unintended consequence, I am glad to report that I've lost about 5 lbs since I got the ulcer. All in all, I guess things could have been worse.
Thank God that the BossLady is such an awesome partner. She totally picked up the slack as I lay curled up in bed every night at 8:00 pm. As many of you know, raising a 7-month old infant isn't easy even when there's two of you. Throw in housecleaning, cooking and walking the dog, and you end up with one tired individual. Her first Mother's Day is coming up. I think the woman deserves some serious bling for her efforts. Or maybe a nice big plasma tv so she can curl up on the couch and watch ESPN in HDTV (alright, alright. The tv's for me. But my happiness is her happiness, right? Besides, I think my wife would love to have a big HDTV so we can wake up in the morning together and diss Katie Couric's horrible skin.)
Anyway, like I said, I haven't blogged for about 3 weeks. That's about 1/10 of my little Peanut's life. So needless to say, a lot has happened since I last posted on the site. The Peanut's started eating solid food. She's become a non-stop yapper. She can drag herself around with her arms. And she can even stand by herself for extended periods of time. I'll chronicle more of the details in later posts but, for now, the world is still her chew toy. And I'm still a loving father who remains completely bewildered and infatuated with his little daughter.
Now that I'm back among the living, I'll be updating on a more regular basis. But for now? Be a good friend and pass me that giant bottle of Pepto Bismol, will you?